Afterparty: Bachelorette Party VI

Making hard character choices, keeping your cool in a minecart and jump-starting by the Light. This is the Afterparty, where we sit down after every episode to break down our game and answer your questions about how to play at home.


Live Show

- Get your tickets today at Patrons, click here for a 50% off code!


Find Us Online

- website:

- patreon:

- twitter:

- facebook:

- instagram:

- tumblr:

- merch:

- music:


Cast & Crew

- Dungeon Master: Eric Silver

- TR8c (Tracey): Brandon Grugle

- Inara Harthorn: Amanda McLoughlin

- Johnny B. Goodlight: Michael Fische

- Creative Contributors: Connor McLoughlin, Julia Schifini, Heddy Hunt

- Multitude:


About Us

Join the Party is a collaborative storytelling and roleplaying podcast. That means four friends create a story together, chapter by chapter, that everyone from seasoned players to true beginners can enjoy. Where else can you get adventure, intrigue, magic, drama, and lots of high fives all in one place? Right here.


After each episode we sit down for the Afterparty, where we break down our game and answer your questions about how to play Dungeons & Dragons and other roleplaying games at home. We also have the Punchbowl, an interview series with people pushing D&D forward creatively, communally and socially. It’s a party, and you’re invited! Find out more at


[theme music]

Amanda: [quietly, imitating a relaxed golf commentator] We are sitting here at the table, uh, watching the DM look at Brandon with, uh, dare I say a manic look in his eye? Johnny, how would you- how would you describe this?

Michael: [in similar commentator voice] You know, I would say manic is certainly one of the ways, but I would like to focus on the teeth. The mouth is open, just almost just a little bit- oh, he’s opened it more. It is disturbing.

Amanda: It’s glistening, it is poised.

Michael: The glisten is- it’s catching my eye. Oh!

Amanda: Oh no! Oh no! 

Michael: There’s some tongue action now that has become from the realm of gross to just disturbing.

Amanda: Let’s uh… Let’s return to the eyes, which are wide-

Michael: And he takes the shot, and it’s a hole in one right there! The shot was good! The DM has returned with just a wonderful performance. Amanda slash Inara, how do you feel about this DM just staring into the soul of Brandon slash Tracey, just devouring him from the outside?

Amanda: You know, Johnny slash Michael, it really just brings up the ethics of this sport. Whether or not the entertainment we derive from these men, I don’t know, destroying, nay-

Michael: Their bodies and souls, truly, I agree. Absolutely. 

Amanda: Yeah, yeah- nay, eviscerating one another.

Michael: Oh, god.

Amanda: In the name of- of entertainment and sport.

Michael: Oh lordy. Truly, this is the worst of times. For CBS, I’m Johnny B. Goodlight.

Amanda: I’m Inara Harthorn.

Michael: And for Fox News, we report [all laughing] that NBC Sports got your back for all of this year’s DM Stares and Player in a Weird Way that Disturbs Us All.

Amanda: ABC, Characters Welcome.

Brandon: Um… I’m gonna hand in my resignation.

[Michael and Amanda chuckling]

Brandon: Um…

Michael: For the- for the Eric part, or for what we did?

Brandon: Just, like- 

Amanda: Just all?

Brandon: Why pick it apart, you know? It was all symptomatic of a larger problem.

Amanda: Just all of the last half hour, yeah.

Brandon: Yeah, mhm. Mhm.

Amanda: We did some sick moves though.

Michael: B-T-dubs, welcome to the Afterparty.

Amanda: Hey, hi, hello, it’s the Afterparty, where Eric is so delighted with himself, and Brandon is, dare I say, shook? Johnny, have we- have we now named your Dancing Light bulbs?

Michael: So, the Dancing Lights that were featured in this episode- if you at home wanna buy your own Dancing Light, you should get the Eduardo-

Amanda:! Actually I really do want little knit Dancing Light kits. Wouldn't that be cute?

Michael: Or night lights!

[Amanda gasps]

Brandon: There should be a Johnny nightlight. For suuuuuuure there should be a Johnny nightlight.

Michael: Um, the-

Brandon: Stop looking at me, Eric!

Eric: I will not!

Amanda: Johnny B. Good-nightlight?

Michael: Oh that’s so good! There are two things happening here, and I like both of them very much.

Amanda: [laughing] As usual, Fish and I are taking a joke too far, and Eric and Brandon are having feelings over plot.

[all laughing]

Michael: Um, the lights were named Eduardo, Bob, Janice, and Carl. I’d like to think that these are just four of the options of distinctive lights that I could have chosen, and so if anyone out there who has more artistic skill than I wants to have a picture of Johnny with all of his light children-

Amanda: Yeah.

Michael: That’s totally cool.

Amanda: I’m- just looking at you with about 55 dice in front of you-

Michael: It’s like that-

Amanda: -of which you can only choose one, right- of the Dancing Lights, like a Pokedex, you know, there’s many of them hidden somewhere, somehow in a computer. I guess at the health center, and then you can draw out a team, you know, at a given time.

Michael: To make it clear, Eduardo was for the most part protecting and helping Inara out.

Amanda: He was.

Michael: And Janice was the utilitarian, like helpful-

Amanda: Good Janice or bad Janice?

Michael: You know, I prefer good Janice, but bad Janice is a lot of fun to hang out with.

Amanda: It’s true.

Brandon: What is your starting six lights?

Michael: You know, at least my starter has to be Eduardo. Obviously, Eduardo is the one that I depend on the most, which is why I send Eduardo to be with Inara, absolutely. Janice is like that Pidgey you get that you grow up to be Pidgeot, and I don’t know about you guys, but I always had Pidgeot as part of my first round through the, um-

Amanda: And maybe there are smarter picks, but there aren’t closer picks.

[Brandon snickering]

Michael: Yeah, it’s just because you wanna have one Pokémon go with you from the beginning that isn’t your starter, and I love that choice, because-

Amanda: Yeah, yeah.

Michael: Yes, there are far better picks, but I love-

Brandon: Oooh story of my love life, huh?

[Amanda and Michael laughing]

Michael: This After Party’s going real well, guys.

Brandon: Do you guys wanna talk about Dungeons and Dragons?

Amanda: We also have to talk about stalagmites and stalactites, because that was on my list, too.

[Eric laughing]

Brandon: What is the difference? What is the-

Amanda: I don’t know.

Brandon: One’s in the ground, one’s I don’t know.

Michael: A stalagmite might come from the ceiling, but they’re actually on the ground. 

Brandon: That’s a good-

Amanda: That’s not helpful.

Brandon: -like a mnemonic? Are you making this up?

[Amanda and Michael cracking up]

Eric: No. Stalag- Jesus. Why?! [upset, over the sound of his players’ laughter] All I want… all I want is for people to be like, “Oh wow! Eric, crazy twist!” and we’re talking about bullshit, fukcing bullshit ways to say stalagmites and stalactites. Or one-

[players laughing hysterically]

First of all, stalactites are tight to the ceiling, that’s how you know it’s a stalactite. 

Michael: That’s why stalagmites-

Amanda: You weren’t wrong, though. You weren’t wrong.

Michael: That’s why stalagmites might be on the ceiling, but they’re not.

Eric: That’s terrible!

Michael: That’s literally how I remember them, though.

Amanda: I was thinking more you look- you look at like a cavernous opening, you have a bunch of jagged teeth coming from the ceiling, and you go, “tight.”

Michael: Oooooooo!

Brandon: Why can’t something be tight to the ground?

Michael: See, here’s the thing. Eric in real life often asks me-

Brandon: Why? Just why?

Michael: Am I just a character and... why? Am I just a character? I am who I am. “Stalagmite might be on the ceiling, but it’s actually on the ground,” is how I remember the difference.

Amanda: [laughing] I’ll never forget it now!

Michael: I’m not even joking. That’s literally how I remember. 

Amanda: Eric, tell us about the cart race?

Michael: [interrupting, shouting overenthusiastically] Oh my gosh, Tracey! Other Traceys! What’s happening here?!

Eric: Thank you! Thank you! Jesus!

Amanda: Wow! What a cool and remarkable homebrew Initiative system!

Michael: Wow! Crazy! How- what's happening? [making game noise] blah-blah-bloooooo! It’s like Undying Light times but for Tracey!

Amanda: Blorp, blorp, blorp, blorp…

Michael: Blorp, blorp…

Brandon: Those rocks were really pretty, though. In my head.

Amanda: Pretty rocks! I collected rocks as a kid.

Brandon: Yeah, I did too!

Michael: I had one of those-

Brandon: What was your favorite?

Amanda: Pink.

Michael: [excited] I had one of those rock cleaner things.

Brandon: Nice. You had a rock cleaner? Like a rock tumbler?

Michael: Yeah, a rock tumbler cleaner, yeah!

Amanda: [giggling] Aww!

Brandon: How long do you think we can do this until Eric actually murders us?

[Michael laughing]

Amanda: I think it’s now.

[Eric sighs]

Amanda: You know guys, I’ve spent a lot of time thinking about how I can be most helpful to the team in life, and this campaign, but today I figured, “You know what? I really wanna see what’s behind that mirror.” And I could try to be deceptive, but the easiest and simplest thing would be to tell you what the deal is, not mention the Assassin’s Guild because why do that? And go discover. So I had a lot of fun pretending to be freakin’ Nancy Drew over here.

Brandon: What were you most proud of, Fish?

Michael: Not vomiting.

Brandon: Yeah, I’m- thank you.

Amanda: Word. You know, at the end of the day, at least we can look at ourselves in the mirror and say, “I didn’t vomit today.”

Eric: Fish almost vomited in real life.

Michael: I don’t handle that kind of stuff well, and just thinking about going on a roller coaster ride without like being more prepared for it…

Brandon: Can you do something to prepare for a roller coaster ride?

Michael: You- you- laugh at me if you want.

Brandon: I will not!

Michael: I played Roller Coaster Tycoon 3.

Brandon: I looooove it. Love it.

Michael: The one that you can actually set to look- to like make a roller coaster, and you can do first person view, or YouTube videos of roller coaster rides, and like do a lot of those to get used to and prepared for that, and I’ve successfully gone to roller coaster parks and done the whole roller coaster thing, and I can do it if I’ve had time to prepare by looking at it and doing that.

Brandon: Like an immersion therapy type of situation?

Michael: Yeah.

Amanda: Do you have fun when you are on a roller coaster, or is it more like you don’t want to-

Michael: That’s a great question. 

Amanda: -be a downer of the experience?

Michael: That’s a great question.

Brandon: Without an answer.

Michael: You know what, every time I do it, I have more and more fun.

Amanda: Huh. I think that makes total sense to psych yourself up for a thing that is maybe scary but maybe pleasurable.

Michael: Yeah.

Amanda: Brandon, what are you most proud of in this episode?

Brandon: Sweet cart tricks, probably. I don’t know- I don’t- this episode was-

Michael: I like how it’s like cart tricks and not vomit. These are the- these are the three things [laughing]

Amanda: I think you did a pretty good job standing up for your own interests, your friends’ interests, and the public interest all in one episode.

Brandon: I- well, it was tricky because I think like Tracey made a mistake, which I sort of knew was a mistake, but like it was an interesting mistake to make, and I Think something that was important for Tracey to make. But then he also sort of- we haven't seen it yet, but I think he’s going to try to rectify that and be honest about it, which is something that hasn’t happened in the past, so, I don’t know. I think-

Michael: The mistake being-

Brandon: I don’t think there’s any feelings of pride yet, because I don’t think he feels proud of his actions yet.

Amanda: Sure.

Brandon: Maybe in the future.

Michael: The mistake being telling the producers that we had found that secret entrance and we were going there, right?

Brandon: Yeah.

Michael: Right, okay.

Brandon: That- and that- obviously I rolled a nat-1, so that wasn’t supposed to be how that interaction went exactly.

Michael: Sure, yeah.

Brandon: But he’s gonna kill that black beret mud monster.

Michael: I have a feeling that it will just reform.

Brandon: No, he’s gonna find a way to- you know how like in-

Amanda: Burn them!

Brandon: Yeah, exactly. Fire.

Michael: You know, one of the things for me that was really interesting- not necessarily pride, but interesting, was in my head we had a moment where we were trying to figure out what we were gonna do, and I like lectured the three other people here of what I thought was going on based on the evidence that we had had before, and I love that- not the sound of my voice, which I also do love- but the like- this is my theory of what’s going on, and let me share it with you. 

Something that I’ve not necessarily- I’ve even mentioned it today- I’ve not necessarily like always shared with the players and the DM how I felt things were going on, and today I did, which I’m happy I did because I normally don’t. And I think it helped us in terms of our decision making. I don't know how much of it actually will go on in the episode, but you know.

Amanda: Normally we try to reserve our discussion about the game to when we’re here at the table recording, talking either as characters or as players on the episode.

Michael: Yeah.

Amanda: Like we try to save most of it for tape.

Michael: Yeah.

Amanda: So I- I thought it was cool. Most players probably would text with each other in between sessions during the week, and it was- it was neat. And I did too. At one point, I didn’t know what to do, and I asked you guys for advice, so I think at this point when our default is to keep it for the episode, we can on occasion talk to each other. It’s not like we’re doing that every single time.

Michael: I will say for the three of us as players, this was a tough episode, especially at the beginning because none of us really had a good idea of what we wanted to do. We had ideas- hold on! I’m getting to you, Brandon! Wait.

[Amanda laughing]

Brandon: That was what I was most proud of. I was most proud of my plan.

Michael: We each had-

Amanda: It was a good plan. RIP.

Brandon: RIP.

Michael: We each had specific actions we wanted to do, but we didn’t have like an overall group focused plan of what we wanted. Brandon had an idea that he wanted to continue going on the Red Throat Gang.

Brandon: [under his breath] Brandon had the perfect plan. Fully formed.

Michael: Johnny and Michael do not want to… Johnny will shoot Kevin Vacation a thousand times, but Johnny will not-

Brandon: [laughing] Please don’t!

Michael: But Johnny will not be a part of the Red Throat Gang.

Amanda: Oh no, I could have seduced Brinksy instead of leaving down this cave hatch…

Brandon: Mhm. you missed your opportunity.

[Amanda sighs]

Michael: I mean there were several options-

Brandon: I would have afforded you that in my plan.

Michael: Eric gave us a lot of different like cracks in this mansion, direction-wise, to go. Amanda went with what she normally doesn't do and just went for it. 

Amanda: Yeah.

Michael: I personally would have liked to have investigated the gym more because it messed with Johnny.

Amanda: I was afraid it would make us agro, you know?

Michael: Fair.

Amanda: And the bar is in public and we’re in the bathroom already, so-

Michael: Listen-

Amanda: To me I wanted to get out of the framework that had done us badly as soon as we could.

Michael: I mean I’m not saying it was a bad idea, it just wasn't where I was-

Amanda: It probably was a bad idea- it’s what-

Michael: I mean look, Johnny and Michael nearly vomited so that’s a thing. So I don’t know. I thought it was just very interesting that we were kind of lost as a group dynamic- not necessarily individually lost.

Amanda: Right.

Michael: Because we all had ideas of what we wanted to do, but we didn’t have ideas of what us as a group should do, and at the end we found ourselves on a mine cart getting ourselves to a place where we might learn more about Tracey- Eric and Brandon, how do you guys- what do you guys think about that? How do you feel about that?

Brandon: Well Eric loves it, but I’m hesitant about it. I don’t understand exactly what’s happening, because Eric and I have talked a little bit off- we’ve talked extensively, actually- off-mic and written a lot of stuff about what could happen. And every time I throw ideas to Eric,  or like backstory to Eric, it’s- it’s intentionally supposed to be like, “Here’s fodder for your ideas if you want to take it or not,” So it’s really exciting for me as a player to see everything I’ve thought about taken and molded into a way that is still new to me and super interesting and engaging-

Amanda: But based in thought you’ve had about the character?

Brandon: Yes, but I also- it's changed enough that I don’t know, genuinely, don’t know what’s happening.

Amanda: Cool.

Brandon: So it’s like scary in a good way.

Michael: It could be a red herring.

Brandon: Could be a red herring. There could be a red herring in one of those suits.

Eric: Um, in terms of me being happy about what happened, yeah. I’m excited about the amount of prep that I’ve done. I think this might be the most amount of prep that I’ve done ahead of time to figure out, like, what do you guys wanna do next, and I have a lot of stuff rolled up, and game mechanics and all that stuff. But it’s like, I guess I’m not doing plot for me. Like, I’m not necessarily happy. Like I’m doing it for yooooouuu guys. Like I set up your backstories, and I give you things for you to interact with, so I’m happy we got there. I’m happy we- we managed to end up in this robot room. But I definitely want to see what happens next.

Brandon: Ooh, the Robot Room is the name of the Jazz Lounge that all the warforged go to.

Amanda: Nice.

Brandon: To drink Manhattans and listen to smooth jazz.

Eric: Tech jazz.

Brandon: Tech jazz. Yeah. It’s just four laptops on a stage.

[all chuckling]

Eric: I would also like to say I don't necessarily want to believe that like our high fantasy setting is in medieval times. I know that’s like a really easy, like, place to default to, but like it’s not necessarily true. There’s a lot of tech. There's a lot of like energy that’s powered by magic. 

Amanda: A projector?

Eric: There’s a projector. I feel like we are a lot closer to modern times than anything else, but we just have like- the energy source is something else.

Michael: Like there may be working lights on all the streets, but you don’t all have a microwave kind of thing.

Eric: Exactly, and I think-

Michael: I mean we had a few examples. Like what’s-it’s-face- the thing in the ship?

Eric: Comway.

Amanda: Comway.

Eric: We have a robot- we have a airship with an onboard computer-

Michael: Yeah.

Amanda: Kinda steampunky.

Eric: We have airships for that- yeah. It’s closer to steampunky, and again like just because there-

Michael: From like a Final Fantasy, yeah.

Eric: Yeah. Just because there is an aristocrasy or a quote-unquote like monarchy and there are autocrats, like doesn't mean that we’re living in medieval times.

Amanda: Sure.

Eric: I think that like being Americans we make equivalencies between democracy and modern times, and I don’t necessarily know if that’s true.

Amanda: And I think that's a good point too, because a lot of why Alonzo’s character journey is what it is, is because this is what we think of as an archaic system of government in a more modern society, and so things like PR, and image, and proving its worth and why it’s there, and I think the kind of like pathos behind a new-ish system of government, I think is stuff they’re thinking about, and why Alonzo is appointed as champion and is doing what he is. So I definitely default to medieval when I think high fantasy, and when I think of fantasy at all, I think high fantasy, so I think it’s a good reminder.

Michael: You just made me think of a new fan theory. An apocalyptic event happened that, you know, things kind of reverted to a more medieval-like feel, but there’s still technology powered by energy and magic, and the Undying Light may have been something that was popular and now is not. The Undying Light is nuclear energy.

[Amanda gasps]

The light part is the power. The shadow is the weaponry side of it. That’s why whenever Johnny is doing all bad magic stuff that’s hurtful, the Shadow is like, “Yeah, nice!” because it’s like nuclear weapons, but then you know, Light, literal light is- I just now thing Johnny is a fission bomber, something-

Amanda: Or…

Michael: hydrogen…

Amanda: The shadow’s a pathogen and the light is UV purifying light.

Eric: Oooh. That’s close but really this is all just a metaphor to get on the silver standard.

[all chuckling]

Michael: Love it. Oh my god, so good. So good.

Brandon: So for the mine cart race, was there things that we could have encountered that we didn’t see? Was there a table that you had?

Eric: Yeah, I actually found a bunch of really interesting stuff online, from like 3.5 that I was able to mash together. Yeah, there were a bunch of events that we didn't do. I had a event table of ten, and we did three and then we had the bridge out, which was gonna happen at the end. I wanna say, if you did poorly on the bridge out, you would’ve went somewhere else. Like, if you succeeded, you were gonna go to the robot room, but like you could have veered off to the right, you could have fell right into the chasm.

Amanda: How did you determine success?

Eric: I gave you extra points if you did cool stunts, which you totally did, and you guys all rolled pretty well. Actually, Fish’s Con roll was actually for like steadying the mine cart just as much.

Amanda: Right.

Eric: If you guys did poor on your stunts, but it seemed like everything kind of evened out and you- your DCs were all pretty high.

Michael: But then also we were going fast. If we had gone slowly, we probably would have fallen down.

Eric: Yup.

Michael: Gone somewhere else, maybe a room about the Undying Light, maybe a room directly more related to the plot as opposed to a character thing.

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: Who knows, yeah.

Eric: Yeah, if you had gone slow, that was actually- there was no way for you to have crossed the chasm.

Amanda: Hmm.

Brandon: So really, if we had followed Johnny, we would have all died.

Michael: Johnny…

Amanda: So be reckless.

Michael: Does not regret-

Amanda: Do it for the vine.

Michael: Nope. Nope.

Amanda: Do it for the gram.

Michael: Nope. Nope.

Eric: I’m also surprised no one pulled the emergency brake, because i did say it was only gonna slow down one thing. 

Amanda: We wanted to reserve that for, if for example the track led to like a cliff wall we would have smacked against like a bug, you know?

Michael: I’ve played video games. I’m only pulling that if there’s literally no other option because then I don’t get to do it again.

Eric: Yup. Yeah, you’re totally right. Depending on what your Strength roll was you might have broken off the emergency brake.

[Michael laughs]

Michael: I have a negative one Strength.

Amanda: Tracey, don’t do it.

Eric: I’m excited. I mean, I feel like this happens to Johnny a lot- Johnny gets like actions and then it always hurts him in the end.

Michael: Yes. 

Eric: But like I also wanted to give you a reward. This one also- it’s funny for the glow capped mushrooms-

Michael: Hurting myself?

Eric: I was gonna give you advantage if you were actually going to like be attracted to it, like in my head, but it turns out that it happened anyway, so like it was totally fine.

Michael: Hmm.

Eric: Like you were the only- it’s kind of funny that you were the only one who saw it. Yeah, I had some other stuff. Do you wanna know some of the other stuff?

Brandon: Yeah!

Amanda: Yeah!

Eric: Um, let’s see I had one: “low ceiling,” so you guys needed to duck down. There was “well-timed track change” was you could hit a switch on a track as a ranged attack, and then you would have gotten advantage on another challenge if you got it. There was a loop-de-loop-

[Amanda gasps]

Literally like a roller coaster.

Amanda: Oh no. I’m sorry, Fish.

Michael: Horrible.

Brandon: Um, Michael Fische would not have made that.

Michael: I liter- I can’t do roller coasters that have those.

Eric: I had some other damaging ones and there was a swarm of bats. I also had “nothing happens,” 

[Amanda laughing]

Where I just wrote, “Nothing happens. You good. Take a moment to reflect on how wild your lives are.”

[Brandon chuckling].

Amanda: Not a bad idea.

Eric: Yeah. So I’m pretty happy with the way this went and the way that my rolls went.

Brandon: I’m changing my answer. I’m proud of how well I rolled this episode.

Eric: Oh my god.

Amanda: You did.

Eric: I was-

Amanda: You did roll really well.

Eric: I was waiting for someone to freak out and get to the fake monster mouth.

Amanda: Hehe!

Eric: I was so ready for it. You were in a panic, and I was gonna try to make you pull the emergency brake or something.

Brandon: Can’t phase me. I’m just too good, you know?

Eric: You always roll well on-

Brandon: Everything.

Eric: Investigation rolls.

Brandon: Everything.

Amanda: Everything all the time, what are you talking about?

Brandon: Always.

Eric: Always.

Michael: I’m glad that we got them teeth.

Amanda: Oh yeah.

Eric: Yeah, you guys [laughing] that’s the best you might have rolled-

Amanda: If you think I’m not gonna make like a millenial choker out of that and wear it next time I see Captain Alex, you’re wrong.

So we have a question here from Calli in the Discord: If the party was hanging out with Stoneface playing ‘Two Truths and a Lie,’ what would each characters truths and lie be? Including Stoneface.

Eric: I think that Stoneface like doesn’t really understand how the game works.

Brandon: You’re kidding, that makes two people.

Eric: Really… So I think that like he- all of his are like really close to each other. So it was like 

Eric (as Stoneface): Ay, I’m made of stone. Uh, you guys don’t know my dad. And I don’t love- I love sandwiches.

[all laughing]

Brandon: Okay, that’s very good, and I don’t think he understands the game.

Eric: I think he’s just happy to hang out.

Brandon: Yeah.

Amanda: Does Tracey understand the game?

Brandon: No. Uh, well, yes, he understands the basic concept, but he doesn’t enjoy the fact that we’re trying to trick people [laughing]

[Eric laughing]

Amanda: Fair. Fair.

Michael: That’s very good.

Amanda: Very in character.

Brandon: So it’s like warforged are cool, warforged are not cool, and I love you all.

Amanda: Great. Aww!

Eric: I do love that it’s all subjective. He doesn’t give any like hard truths. They’re all like, “I think that flowers are nice.”

[all laughing]

Amanda: Inara’s would probably be like: Oatcake is the best dog, Oatcake is the best animal, I have a crush on Captain Alex.

Eric: It’s like none of those are-

Brandon: Wait, those are all true!

Eric and Michael: Those are all true.

Amanda: Ahh!

Eric: But like she did it on purpose. She absolutely knows how the game works-

Brandon: Yeah, she like winks.

Eric: She just wants all of you to know all of these things.

Amanda: Yeah.

Michael: Johnny’s gonna take it very seriously and say only lies.

[Eric laughing]

Johnny will say that he was the cause of The Centering,

[Amanda giggling]

The Undying Light is actually three gnomes in a, uh, trench coat.

Eric: Yeah.

Michael: And I am Stoneface’s father.

Eric: Those are good ones!

Amanda: Another question. Katie asks: If the game was instead a family sitcom, what wacky slice-of-life predicaments would they find themselves in?

Eric: Oh god.

[Brandon cracking up]

Michael: Okay so…

Eric: That’s so good.

Michael: Let’s just run through this.

Amanda: My first thought-

Brandon: [singing, like a sitcom theme song] Tracey and John-ny!

Michael: Are the like- are the spouses. They’re like-

Brandon: [in exaggerated sitcom voice] I asked you to buy bananas [in normal voice] this is my Tracey sitcom voice.

Michael: Honey, you know that I don’t go shopping on Tuesdays!

Amanda: [exaggerated laughing] Hahahahaha!

Michael: [like sitcom trombone cue] Baaaa-baaaa.

Eric: I wholeheartedly see Tracey in like a beehive wig.

Michael: Oh my gosh, yes.

Amanda: Oh yeah, ‘I Love Lucy’ style.

Michael: Yeah.

Brandon: And a robe a lot of the time.

Amanda: My first thought was like a heartwarming coming out episode where Inara is really sad  and nervous the entire time and then it’s all like, 

“Honey, your mom is bi!” 


Michael: Oh I thought it was like, “Yeah, Inara, we knew.”

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: Yeah, probably, probably that. Probably that.

Brandon: Just like some heartwarming synth pad just underneath it like, “Ahhhhh”

Amanda: Yeah, like [singing same tone as Brandon] “Everything’s fiiiiiiine.”

Eric: “I like boys and girls” and like yeah we know, you tell us that you think girls are- are cute all the time.

Amanda: Like the first NPC backstory of Alonzo-

Eric: Oh my god.

Amanda: Is just Alonzo being like, 

“Dad, you don’t understand me!”

And the dad’s like, “Alonzo.” 

And he’s like, “You- you can’t judge me for-,” 

“Alonzo. Alonzo. Alonzo. I know. I know.”

Eric: Oh god- the first thing I ever thought about when I was writing that NPC backstory is like, what is like the most obnoxious way to come out? And it’s to continuously come out to everyone all the time as like a way to deflect.

[all laughing]

Amanda: “Dad, you can’t make me clean my room just because I’m gay!” 

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: “It’s not because you’re gay Alonzo, you just have to clean your room, come on.”

Eric: You just- you just can’t avoid, he’s like, “I love DUDES!” and I’m like, “Yeah, you tell me that all the time.”

Michael: And we’re OKAY with that, that’s great!

Amanda: And I love you and also you have to go to work.

Eric: It’s great. It’s super great. But you need to clean your cauldron.

Brandon: Now, which one of us would- supposed to be babysitting Tammy and Taylor and all sorts of of wacky hijinx ensues?

Michael: I think-

Amanda: Definitely Tracey.

Michael: I was thinking that like, Greg’s like the nextdoor neighbor, Alonzo is like the youngest kid-

Amanda: Adorable.

Brandon: Greg’s like the guy with the leather jacket that’s like too cool for school.

Michael: No- oh, okay.

Brandon: But he’s not actually.

Eric: Like the Fonz?

Brandon: I was thinking more like John Stamos in ‘Full House’, you know?

Eric: Yeah.

Michael: I was thinking more that Greg was Stefan Urquelle

[Eric laughing]

Eric: Alonzo is Urkel and Greg is Stefan Urquelle?

Michael: Yep.

Eric: I love it.

Amanda: Is that the kid with the catchphrase?

Eric: [imitating Steve Urkel] Did I do that?

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: Okay.

Brandon: Is that Crews?

Michael: I feel like Greg would be-

Eric: Yeah, I shoulda said, “Did I do that?!” Goddamn!

Michael: Ooooooh damn!

Eric: My biggest DM regret is not writing down more catchphrases.

[Amanda laughing]

Michael: As long as we don’t do any of those like horribly creepy awful 80s and 90s sitcom stuff like the like-

Eric: Oh you mean like the very special episodes?

Michael: Oh, I hate very special episodes. As long as we don’t do those.

Brandon: It’s like one- Tracey takes-

Michael: Or they’re all very special episodes.

Brandon: Tracey takes Chad home and- as like a romantic partner, and everyone’s uncomfortable with it because Chad’s a human maybe? Mehhh.

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: Tracey gets addicted to caffeine pills.

[Brandon laughing]

Amanda: Oh nooooo! “Say, mom, I’m just a boy in love with an ooze…”

Eric: “Standing in front of an ooze, standing in front of a boy…”

Amanda: “Trying to live my life.”

Brandon: And Chad’s like, “I am a hoo-man.”

Eric: “I am also a boy.”

Brandon: “Hello, mom.”

Amanda: Extends a single flower from the ooze, dripping. Aww, so cute.

Brandon: “I heard hoo-mans like flowers.”

Amanda: Aww, Chad.

Michael: The flower’s disintegrated.

Amanda: Chad’s just trying his best.

Eric: Guess who’s coming to dinner? An ooze.

Michael: Oh no.

[all laughing]

Michael: That’s a very interesting take on that, because of the racial and social…

Eric: I know, I think that there should be- what- oh, man, just like inverting all of that stuff with fantasy tropes.

Amanda: Question from Candice: What jobs would the party and Stoneface and Alonzo have if they were just some cool friends living in New York City?

Eric: [singing ‘Friends’ theme] Bam-badada-bah-bah-bah-bahbah!

Michael: [joining in] Bam-badada-bah-bah-bah-bahbah!

Eric: So no one told you this Adventure’d be this waaaaaay…

[all clap four times, as in ‘Friends’ theme]

Amanda: Is this…

Michael: Oh my gosh!

Brandon: [laughing] Oh noooooooo!

Michael: Oh no!

Amanda: Hold on. Hold on.

Michael: Don’t say it. Don’t say it. Amanda has no idea what this is!

[Brandon screaming in agony]

Brandon: I’m dying on the inside.

Michael: Amanda was just looking at us… oh no. Do you- you have no idea what this is.

Amanda: I am a hoo-man.

[Eric laughing]

Michael: Oh noooooo!

Eric: Amanda’s been an ooze this whole time.

Amanda: Hold on, hold on, hold on. It’s probably not ‘Seinfeld.’

Eric: No, it’s not.

Michael: Oh, sh- you said the name of it too.

Amanda: I don’t think it’s ‘Sex In The City.’

Eric: No.

Michael: Oh, no, it’s definitely not.

Amanda: I don’t think there’d be clapping in ‘Sex In The City.’

Eric: This is just in the theme song.

Michael: You said the name of the show in the question.

Eric: You got it. You got it. Give her a second.

Michael: You can do this.

Amanda: Oh! Is it ‘Friends’?

All: Yes!

Amanda: Yeah!

Brandon: Alright, which one is whom?

Amanda: I don’t- I think Inara would be a disaffected barista who you walk up to the counter and she’s like [unamused] “What?”

Eric: Well, is this like a 90s-

Michael: Wait-

Brandon: Is Inara Gunther?

[all laughing]

Michael: Oooooh! That’s mean!

Eric: But is this like- But like- but like coffee person was like a wai- was more of a waitress, but now barista’s like a different job. Like so are we talking like 90s classic ‘Friends’?

Amanda: Sure.

Brandon: We’re talking 90s classic ‘Friends.’

Eric: Or are we talking like now?

Brandon: No.

Eric: Like if ‘Friends’ was now?

Brandon: 90s, pre-cell phones-

Michael: But also, was this specifically about ‘Friends’ the TV show or just friends in New York?

Eric: Friends in New York.

Brandon: We’re just making this up.

Amanda: Lowercase f. Lowercase f.

Michael: Okay, because Johnny is no one in that show, maybe Phoebe.

Brandon: Uh, no, Johnny is hardcore Chandler.

Michael: What?!

Amanda: I think Inara would be a dog walker-babysitter-barista.

Michael: Joey.

Brandon: I don’t think you’re Joey.

Eric: Hold on, we’re not doing ‘Friends’ anymore. I think that Johnny is like someone who’s like older but like they’ve welcomed them in into their group, it’s like, “Ah man, I went through this tough divorce!”

Brandon: [gasps] He’s Tom Selleck!

Eric: Yeah. He’s Tom Selleck. He’s basically Tom Selleck. I like it.

Amanda: I feel like Alonzo would be a trust fund kid trying to write.

Eric: Yup. For sure.

Brandon: The yuppie that lives on Roosevelt Island.

Michael: Johnny goes to the Y. Johnny goes absolutely to the Y.

Eric: [laughing] That’s his job is going to the Y?

Michael: No, he’s like old so he doesn’t really have a job. He’s done working. He just goes to the Y, hangs out with the young kids so he stays cool, and-

Amanda: He like takes improv classes.

Michael: He takes improv classes, he goes to- he goes to way too many Broadway shows and no one knows how he has that kind of money.

Brandon: Right.

Eric: He has secret money.

Michael: There is no explanation as to where the money-

Eric: Johnny totally has secret money.

Brandon: [quietly] I don’t know if I like Johnny.

Amanda: He’s a museum patron.

Michael: No one likes this person, but you’re still friends with him because he’ll let you go to a Broadway show.

Eric: Stoneface is a bouncer-

Brandon: Yes.

Michael: Yes.

Amanda: [whispering] YES!

Eric: -at a club, and like they made friends with him- or he’s a bartender and they made friends with him like there, but then he became like their real friend later.

Amanda: Yeaaaaah!

Brandon: Is Tracey a pizza maker or a bartender?

Eric: Oh no, Tracey’s like a baker. Tracey has like crazy hours.

Amanda: Yeah, a baker.

Eric: Like you need a friend who has super weird hours.

Amanda: Tracey’s a vegan baker.

Brandon: Noooo….

[Eric laughing hysterically]

Amanda: No?

Brandon: Noooooo...

Michael: No, but you’re definitely doing artisan. It’s artisan baking though. It’s very niche.

Amanda: I thought it’d be like anti-cruelty, you know, like-

Brandon: Oh, I see what you’re saying.

Eric: Like you guys have chickens there.

Michael: Tracey- Tracey has won a James Beard award for his baking.

Amanda: Yeah, just super local.

Eric: Yeah and it’s like, “This is my friend James, he has a beard!”

Brandon: Super local.

Amanda: Like Northwest corner of Washington Square Park dandelion salad.

All: Yeah.

Brandon: Goes to the farmers market every morning at 4am to get the ingredients he needs.

Amanda: Sure, yeah.

Michael: Greg and Alonzo went to NYU.

Amanda: Really enjoys massaging the basil leaves.

[Eric laughing]

Amanda: Thank you for joining us for this Afterparty and doing sweet kickflips and 1080s with us. You can brag about your skateboarding tricks, or tell us what your D&D characters would do at Six Flags, or your headcanon for ours on Twitter @jointhepartypod, on Facebook, on Instagram, on Tumblr, in our patron-only Discord, or via email We are always looking for more questions for the Afterparty, so send us your questions on any of those media. We would love to hear from you.

On our Patreon, as always you can join and get bonus content. You can get bloopers for every episode. You can get NPC backstories that Eric writes for every single episode. I’m so excited to see what this one’s will be. And of course to talk to everyone else in our patron community in our Discord, see their pet photos, see their skateboard stickers, the cakes that they make at work. It’s awesome. Thanks, Neon. 

And with that, may all your- may all your loop-de-loops go well.

Brandon: May all your dice rolls be 20s.

Eric: See ya later.

Michael: Undying Light be with you. And don’t vomit.

[theme music]