31. Legends of the Divine Labyrinth V

- Theme Song: Lyrics by Eric Silver, music by Brandon Grugle. Vocals by Brandon Grugle, Lauren Shippen, Julia Schifini, Roux Bedrosian, Eric Silver, Tyler Silver, and Amanda McLoughlin. Available for purchase here.

- Artwork: Allyson Wakeman

- Multitude: https://multitude.productions

About Us

Join the Party is an actual play podcast with tangible worlds, genre-pushing storytelling, and collaborators who make each other laugh each week. We welcome everyone to the table, from longtime players to folks who’ve never touched a roleplaying game before. Hop into our current campaign, a pirate story set in a world of plant- and bug-folk, or marathon our completed stories with the Camp-Paign, a MOTW game set in a weird summer camp, Campaign 2 for a modern superhero game, and Campaign 1 for a high fantasy story. And once a month we release the Afterparty, where we answer your questions about the show and how we play the game. New episodes every Tuesday.

Transcript

Eric: I remember a time before the Cascade dried up. Here in Verda Stello, the four nations of plant and bug people flourished and thrived. But the great waterfall that fed the land slowed to a trickle, revealing a vast Salt Sea and unknown islands. The only guide were the words of the 13 Dried Carvings. “The water will slow to fall, but the tides are turning. Find the Infinite Lake to replenish the world and discover the Salmon who will grant you a wish of whatever you desire.” This marks the beginning of the tide, as many Greenfolk hauled onto ships to find the Infinite Lake and maybe riches, adventure, excitement, and purpose along the way. And what exactly is a salmon? Is that a berry? That was 50 years ago, and the Tide rushes forward ever still. There are many stories caught on the wind between sails, but why don't we hear just one? Of a butterfly gunman with clipped wings, a ripened and explosive piece of produce, and a witch made out of tea. This is Join the Party Campaign 3, The Rising Tide!

[theme]

Amanda: Last time on Join the Party.

Eric: The crew made it into the Grove, safe from the slicing ire of the Harvester. Inside, they pluck the maze key. Key, get! One out of four, baby. Inside, the crew looks around at the bucolic and divine calm. Umbi and Cammie stumble upon a sleeping woman and are warned by the Stump of Riddles, who now has bodacious curves, not to wake her up. Umbi promptly wakes her up and is yeeted out of the Grove by a tree growing underneath him. Gloria, who is the sleeping woman, awakes and transforms into a terrible mushroom monster, but Cammie puts her back to sleep and removes the curse afflicting her. While all that is happening, Troy has an invasive thought burrow into his brain, because Amanda rolled a Nat 1, and stole a pumpkin puppy from the Grove's Puppy Party. Havana is incredibly overwhelmed by all of the shenanigans pulled in this holy? Site, especially since Cammie is wanted by the Planter who definitely, like, exists here. Havana is also then yeeted somewhere into the labyrinth by another tree growing underneath him. Two friends forward, one friend back. Let's get the party started.

[theme ends]

Eric: I'm not really sure how you can beat getting thrown out of the Garden of Eden, but let's see what happens today.

Julia: I don't know. That's pretty good. That's pretty good.

Brandon: I mean, what if you get thrown out twice?

Julia: You know, what if I went back in and then got thrown out?

Eric: You're gonna double Lucifer? I haven't seen that since the X Games.

Amanda: What about Julia curing a curse from a centuries? Old perhaps demigod?

Julia: I think that's pretty cool.

Eric (as Gloria): Pretty cool.

Brandon: Pre— pretty cute.

Eric (as Gloria): I like it. I like it.

Julia: You sound like you really are excited about that.

Eric: No, that wasn't me— Gloria—

Amanda: That's Gloria. That's Gloria.

Eric (as Gloria): No, I'm Gloria. I love that I'm not cursed anymore. It's awesome.

Julia: Oh, okay. Great. I'm sorry, Gloria.

Eric (as Gloria): Hi, I'm Gloria. I'm really powerful. I could step in past the fourth wall.

Amanda (as Gloria): My bones are a little jelly, though?

Julia: Cute. That's really cute.

Eric (as Gloria): I don't have bones. It's more of a serie— series of tubes. Sometimes I'm squishy and I can move through things.

Julia: Right. Because you're a glowworm.

Brandon: Everyone's gonna start shipping Gloria and Umbi now that they can both break the fourth wall.

Eric: Yeah, you did. You— you started— that was— that was you. Brandon, you started the ship.

Brandon: Oops. Oh, no, everyone's gonna ship Gloria and Umbi. Oh, no. Glombi. Oh, no.

Amanda: archiveofourown.org, search Umbi/Gloria.

Eric: It's Glombi.

Brandon: That's so bad, Glombi.

Eric: Well, I like Glombi. Is it better than Umbia? Umbia is what you get when your feet are in water for too long.

Amanda: Oh, no.

Eric: It's like trench foot, but scientifically, it's Umbia.

Brandon: Yeah.

Amanda: Tough.

Julia: Umbi is just one of the lands of The British Isles but from real long time ago.

Brandon: That's true, that's true. There be dragons.

Julia: It borders Wales.

Eric: Yeah, it's just the— it's in the there be dragons section. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hell yeah. Well, y'all have escaped— the way that I've been envisioning this is like a point-and-click adventure. So it really feels like we've, like, star wiped to the next scene, like moving away from this. So y'all have one point from Umbi looking forward ahead at the labyrinth. You've pushed over the Harvester hilariously, who is probably upset about that, but we'll talk about that at some point. So it is now four of you. It's you three, and Gloria, who has just recovered from being asleep for an extended period of time with no curse. What's his name? Havana Tropicana has been flung somewhere.

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: You can decide to do whatever you want at this point. But if you decide to navigate the Divine Labyrinth, remember, you gotta roll plus survival. We're still looking for points. Now, you can spend five points to find Havana as well.

Brandon: Is that the last one? The last blank?

Eric: That is the new one, that is not the blank.

Brandon: Oh, okay.

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: Well, Eric, earlier in this game, you agreed to a joke, which is always your downfall, and allowed me to be proficient in bruvs. So, can I please—

Eric: Oh no, I know. You— it is five points straight up for Havana, but you can still do whatever to try to find him, wherever he is.

Amanda: Yeah. I would love to try to navigate the maze, just leaving the Harvester behind, trying to get toward Havana. And I'd love to be able to add my proficiency bonus to some check, because this is my bruv, and I'm going to find him.

Julia: Are— are we doing this as a group?

Amanda: We're doing this as a group, that's— that's my idea.

Brandon: Yeah.

Julia: Excellent. I love it.

Brandon: Unless you want to split up, but I don't think we should split up anymore.

Julia: I don't think we should split again.

Amanda: Julia never thinks we should split up.

Julia: Yeah, never again.

Brandon: Julia, do you— can— don't tell me, but you have that last blank, right? To spend five?

Julia: Yes.

Brandon: Okay. I don't think I've heard it yet on tape, or if I did, I already forgot it, so it's good.

Julia: That's good, that's good.

Eric: Honestly, at this point with Gloria, I think I should give it to you because I think we already got it.

Julia: Yeah.

Eric: The final blank for Brandon and Amanda. You can spend five now to find the exit, find Havana, or get the drop on the Harvester.

Amanda: Nice.

Brandon: Got it.

Amanda: Incredible.

Julia: Yeah.

Eric: Now, everyone is full up after Gloria gave you the sick— the sick strats.

Julia: I love that.

Amanda (as Troy): Hey, Gloria, do you like happen just know the entire configuration of this maze or something?

Eric (as Gloria): No, I— do you—

Amanda (as Troy): Was this here when you— when you got in?

Eric (as Gloria): It was— it was here. I assumed that it's been reconfigured. Also, I've been asleep for such a long time. I don't know what's different or not. There's so much I have to ask you. There's so much I need to know. But I'm glad I'm moving— I'm glad I'm moving again. I'm— I'm wiggling again.

Brandon (as Umbi): Speaking of that, should we wiggle our way out of here right now before the Harvester gets back up?

Eric (as Gloria): I think we should— we can wiggle. I think we should put a wiggle on. Yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.

Amanda: Troy is clutching the puppy to his chest inside his shirt, and he is just going to kind of stand up straight and sniff the wind, and say—

Amanda (as Troy): Where art thou, my brother?

Eric: Give me a Charisma Check, Troy. And your profi—and you can add your proficiency bonus because you're proficient.

Amanda: Well, that would be a 23.

Brandon: That's really high, Eric.

Julia: That's really good, Eric.

Brandon: That's a very high number.

Julia: Have you considered that that's very good?

Amanda: Rolled an 18, plus 2, my proficiency is 3.

Eric: Okay. If you want to go after Havana, you can do it for 3 points.

Amanda: Yeah, we only have one so far, but let's do it.

Eric: I'm just saying, that's what you get for the point.

Julia: It's cheaper now.

Eric: You're just— you're vibing Havana on the wind.

Amanda: Havana’s on sale.

Eric: Yeah, Havana is on— Havana is on sale, for 3 points instead of 5. The— the blue light special is two hearts coming together as two bruvs. Havana is on clearance.

Brandon: Man, I love it when Havana goes on clearance. It's such a fun time of the year.

Amanda: And you know because it's like 10.97, not 10.99.

Brandon: Yeah, a 100%. Yeah.

Amanda: That’s how you know.

Julia: Eric, can I prepare an action just for— as we're moving through the maze, like keeping my head on a swivel if I see the Harvester being able to cast a spell like the moment I see them?

Eric: Yeah, you can certainly be on alert. We'll see how it goes.

Julia: Okay.

Eric: We'll see how it goes.

Amanda: Brandon, remember how we didn't say that in two episodes?

Brandon: Hmm, no, I don't remember that.

Eric: Okay. Now, that we are back to the regular labyrinth stuff, all four people here have the option to do it, but remember you can only do it once before everyone has to— everyone has to go before you can— someone can re— re-go.

Brandon: Nose goes!

Julia: I'll— I'll go.

Amanda: Julia’s the only one that rolls well, so—

Julia: I have high survival, I'll roll.

Brandon: That was the trick.

Amanda: Yeah, please.

Julia: Yeah. I think for what Cammie is doing is she kind of saw in the distance where Havana was yeeted to, and is going to consult the little map that they made and then be like—

Julia (as Cammie): Okay, I think if we make a left, a left, a right, and then another left, we'll be around where he was?

Eric: I love the idea of you like looking of— Cammie looking up in the sky and, like, in a real anime way, where— where Havana was yeeted and then it's like bing.

Brandon: Yeah.

Eric: —like as a star. It's like—

Eric (as Cammie): Okay, there's the star. I'm the— I'm gonna use the constellations—

Amanda: Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Cammie): —to figure out where I'm going.

Amanda: Like Mew.

Julia: Yes, like Team Rocket blasting off.

Brandon: They like— like lick their finger and— and feel the wind.

Julia: Uh-hmm.

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: That's what their leaves are for, Brandon.

Brandon: Ah. Yeah, yeah.

Julia: I don't have to lick anything, they're already—

Brandon: That's true.

Julia: A 14 plus 3 for a 17.

Eric: That's a 17. One point, baby.

Brandon: Up to two.

Eric: One point. Put one point in the bank.

Julia: I was so close to getting that 18.

Eric: Remember, just to remind everyone, you can spend one point to find something valuable or useful. You can have two points for something valuable and useful. You can spend two points to get a clue where the Harvester is. You can spend two points to go somewhere you've already been. For example, you can go back to the Grove. You can spend four points to get a clue and how to defeat the Harvester. Or you can spend five points to find an exit, find Havana, or get the drop on the Harvester. So you have two points now as you're following.

Julia: Uh-hmm.

Eric: Gloria, are you still— you're still carrying Gloria?

Julia: Yeah, like supporting her on Cammie's shoulder.

Eric: Yeah. I like the idea that it's like the whole upper part of this glow worm is like over your shoulder.

Julia: Like a boa, yeah.

Eric: Yeah.

Eric (as Gloria): So what's happened since— what's happened since I've been in here?

Julia (as Cammie): Well, I don't know when you got in here. Based on just your whole vibe and clothing, it's probably been a while.

Eric (as Gloria): Yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): Do— was the Cas—

Amanda (as Troy): I learned to read.

Julia (as Cammie): Troy learned to read.

Eric (as Gloria): Okay.

Julia (as Cammie): Was the Cascade flowing when you came here or was it not flowing?

Eric (as Gloria): Why would the Cascade not be flowing?

Brandon (as Umbi): Uh-oh.

Amanda (as Troy): Oh, boy.

Julia (as Cammie): Okay. Yeah. Well, so it's not— it's not flowing currently.

Eric (as Gloria): What?

Brandon (as Umbi): Boy, we do have some news for you.

Eric (as Gloria): What did you—

Julia (as Cammie): How did you get here if the Cascade was flowing?

Eric (as Gloria): Incredible amounts of skill. Hold on. Wait a second.

Julia (as Cammie): Cool.

Eric (as Gloria): Why would— you mean the only water source, the main water source for the entire count—

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Gloria): —for the entire place we live, where everything exists? It doesn't—

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah. We—

Eric (as Gloria): —it doesn't—it's not there anymore?

Julia (as Cammie): We don't know— we don't know why.

Eric (as Gloria): The torrenting—the torrenting—

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Gloria): —waterfall that surrounded the entire center?

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah.

Amanda (as Troy): I'm not gonna lie to you, bruv. It's— it's been pretty bad out there.

Brandon (as Umbi): And no one cares. No one cares.

Eric (as Gloria): No one cares?

Brandon (as Umbi): No one cares! No one fucking cares!

Amanda (as Troy): No—

Eric (as Gloria): I feel like people— people would care that all the water is gone.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah, but it— it's been like longer than I've been alive, and beyond that I don't really know. And— and so— like, since it all dried up, and so everybody's like, "Oh, like, going about my job." And like all of us pirates. Like, that's why we're pira— we're pirates. By the way, just in case you don't know.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yar!

Amanda (as Troy): And we're— we're out here, we're doing our thing.

Eric (as Gloria): We're pi—

Amanda (as Troy): Sailing the sea, because you— that's the thing you can do now. And so all of us are just out here like doing our own thing, living our pirate lives, doing a pirate thing. I'm a prince, by the way. I don't know if that's relevant, but like I just— I figured out it should be upfront about it now. Too much

Eric (as Gloria): We're gonna— we're gonna have to slow— oh, sweet child, please, we're gonna have— please slow down. I'm taking— I'm taking in too much.

Amanda (as Troy): You landed with a good crew. We're— we're on the seas, we're thinking about it. We're out here trying to do something about it and bring the Cascade back. Not everyone is.

Brandon (as Umbi): They rarely let me murder anyone.

Eric (as Gloria): Probably for the best. Well, are pirates like water cowboys?

Brandon (as Umbi): That's what I always say.

Julia (as Cammie): Hmm. I mean, kinda.

Eric (as Gloria): Like sea— seaweed cow—

Brandon (as Umbi): Sea cowboys.

Eric (as Gloria): —sea cow— like sea— seaweed cowboys?

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah, yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Gloria): Yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah. Basically, we're trying to like do our own thing, not loyal to any kings or nations. And instead, at least for me, I want to find the wish-granting Salmon, so I can, like, bring back the Cascade and maybe bring some glory to my family.

Eric (as Gloria): Wait, wha— hold up, take— take three steps—

Amanda (as Troy): The keys and also a--

Eric (as Gloria): —take three steps and move back.

Amanda (as Troy): Okay.

Eric (as Gloria): Okay, wait. Oh, there's a salmon that grants wishes?

Julia (as Cammie): Yes.

Brandon (as Umbi): Well, supposedly. We haven't found them yet, but we want to, we're trying to.

Julia (as Cammie): Well, we know the keys exist, so there has to be a salmon.

Brandon (as Umbi): Hey, I'm not doubting. I'm just saying we haven't seen him with our eyeballs yet.

Eric (as Gloria): There are keys that go to this— go to a salmon?

Amanda (as Troy): We don't know what that is. Like, recently, I found a door would have three doorknobs. Maybe it's possible, it's a door with four locks and that's where the salmon is.

Eric (as Gloria): What's a sa— what is a salmon?

Amanda (as Troy): It's a great question.

Eric (as Gloria): What's a salmon?

Brandon (as Umbi): We have no idea.

Amanda (as Troy): They didn't use to have them in olden times?

Julia (as Cammie): We— we simply don't know.

Eric (as Gloria): I thought it was— it's not like a philosophical one— the sound of one hand clapping?

Brandon (as Umbi): Could be.

Eric (as Gloria): A tree falling in the woods?

Julia (as Cammie): We're assuming it's a physical thing. Troy's doing it right now, though, so like—

Eric (as Gloria): I guess that is the sound of one hand, yeah.

Brandon (as Umbi): Troy, do you think that 50 years ago is olden times?

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.

Brandon (as Umbi): Okay. Cool. That makes me feel great.

Julia (as Cammie): Okay. That feels really good.

Eric (as Gloria): 50— when— 50 years ago was when—

Julia (as Cammie): The Cascade dried up, yes.

Eric (as Gloria): It's been 50 years and now no one cares?

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.

Brandon (as Umbi): Correct.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah. And they were even around to remember it. I was just born here.

Brandon (as Umbi): I tried. No one listens.

Julia (as Cammie): I was 13, so—

Amanda (as Troy): But we are now together, we are going to find those keys. We are going to find that salmon. We are going to bring back the Cascade. Sound good to you?

Eric (as Gloria): And you're the only ones trying to do this?

Julia (as Cammie): No.

Eric (as Gloria): No?

Julia (as Cammie): No, I'm sure there's other people, but I don't know if they necessarily want to bring back the Cascade with their wish.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.

Eric (as Gloria): Uh-huh.

Amanda (as Troy): I think the whole thing where like piracy and like— I don't know. Umbi, you know about this— this stuff, like stealing and whatever. I think the country is kind of like it now. And so I don't know if anyone wants it to come back, but we sure do.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah. They seem to care more about pillaging, and power, and land than like, you know, the whole world that we live on, the disc that we live on, imploding, you know, from lack of water.

Amanda (as Troy): The donut.

Julia (as Cammie): The bagel.

Brandon (as Umbi): The bagel, the bialy.

Eric (as Gloria): Uh-huh. Okay. I just— can you just give me a— so I— so I understand— just so I understand what's happening. 50 years ago, the big waterfall that powered the entire world that gave us the amount of— amount of water for everything.

Brandon (as Umbi): Slowed to fall.

Eric (as Gloria): Slowed— slowed and did not, and now is— now no longer exists. It has dried up.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah. Uh-hmm.

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Gloria): And from that point—

Brandon (as Umbi): The four nations of plant and bug people.

Julia (as Cammie): Lived in harmony.

Eric (as Gloria): Oh, and in the— here in the— in the Big Salt Sea.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.

Eric (as Gloria): Now, it's filled with sea—seaweed cowboys.

Julia (as Cammie): Pirates, yeah.

Eric (as Gloria): Pirates.

Julia (as Cammie): It's a little shorter.

Eric (as Gloria): It was pirates. And are kind of looking for the solution to this, which is a salmon, whatever that is—

Amanda (as Troy): Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Gloria): —who will give you a wish that theoretically someone should use on bringing the Cascade back, but that's the best idea right now?

Brandon (as Umbi): Well, no. It's kind of a Hail— Hail Mary and that we could have solved this problem with hard work, dedication, and intelligence, and smart technology, but no one cared.

Eric (as Gloria): But someone should maybe be—someone might be working on that somewhere else. But this is the fu— this is, like, the fun option that everyone's taking advantage of?

Brandon (as Umbi): Well, no one is—

Amanda (as Troy): That we know of.

Brandon (as Umbi): —so we're trying to do the— the thing that will work hopefully.

Eric (as Gloria): Huh. Okay. I've taken it all in, and this all kind of fits together with what I understood before.

Brandon (as Umbi): Uh-hmm.

Eric (as Gloria): It's progressed in a way I was not anticipating, but okay. Alright.

Amanda (as Troy): You landed with a good group.

Eric (as Gloria): Okay.

Julia (as Cammie): We can also answer more of your questions when we're out of the— the kind of scary maze.

Eric (as Gloria): Yeah.

Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, yeah. Should we keep wiggling?

Eric (as Gloria): Le—

Julia (as Cammie): Let's— let's—

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): —keep on keepin’ on.

Amanda (as Troy): Let's get a wiggle on.

Amanda: Troy's gonna roll survival.

Brandon: Is that offensive?

Julia: No.

Brandon: No? Okay. So—

Eric (as Gloria): No, it's my new— it's my new phrase.

Amanda: Troy is going to, again, sniff the wind, feel in his heart where he thinks Havana is. And without looking around the corner, just boldly choose a direction.

Brandon: That sounds right.

Eric: Is he— you're following the heart of the cards?

Amanda: Yeah.

Brandon: I mean, there's only so many options, right?

Julia: Makes sense. Makes sense. Yeah.

Amanda: And that is a 3 plus 3 for a 6.

Eric: Oh, good.

Brandon: That's 6.

Eric: A 6.

Julia: Cool.

Eric: Okay. Oh, less than ten, you get turned around, the Harvester is one step close to you, and the GM can make a hard move against you.

Amanda: Uh-hmm.

Eric: Interesting.

Amanda: Eric, if you take my puppy, someone's gonna die.

[Eric makes dog noises]

Julia: It would've been very funny if Troy just ended up— like the puppy out loose, and Troy ended up chasing the puppy, too.

Brandon: Hmm.

Eric: Yeah. I think here's what happens. Troy boldly walks in a direction, and maybe Troy, you're kind of interested in the fact that it gets all wiggly over here.

Brandon: Hmm.

Eric: There's like— the hedge maze is— kind of goes squiggles from one side to the next—

Amanda: Ooh.

Eric: —even though it is all kind of going straightforward. And as you get closer, you see that there's something in your path. Laying on the ground is a pretty long pamphlet, which you can see because the front of the pamphlet is so bold and so big. It's Dr. Radish Radish’s Advice on Prudence and Taking Your Time.

Brandon: Oh, my God.

Amanda: Hmm.

Brandon: This is the hard move that was taken against us.

Eric: Yeah.

Brandon: I'm so concerned.

Eric: The hard— that's the hard move.

Amanda: It's a really long, little book.

Eric: It's really long, it's not folded up. I— in my head, it's all like what— what Voltaire— like John Locke wrote— wrote on. But it's like— so it's not folded up, it's all like very extended. It's almost like a big map—

Brandon: Uh-hmm.

Eric: —like a big paper map that's not properly folded— yeah.

Amanda: Hmm.

Eric: --Folded over. So it kind of got folded in someplace, so it's all just kind of spread out, and just sitting in the middle of your path.

Amanda: Oh, that's cool. Troy's gonna lean over to take a look. Can I read anything about what's inside the pamphlet?

Eric: Yeah, you can read the pamphlet. What do you want to do?

Amanda: Protecting the puppy like a baby. I'm just going to lean over and look at it, but I'm not going to touch it. Troy's got bigger priorities now.

Brandon: I did think you were gonna say, "Troy turns the corner and steps on a rake and it hits him in the forehead."

Julia: Also very fun, also very tempting.

Eric: Sure, yeah. Give me— what— what would you do to read it? Give me an Investigation Check.

Amanda: Uh-hmm.

Brandon (as Umbi): Troy, what's it say?

Amanda: Why can't I have gotten a 19 before?

Eric: It's a 19?

Amanda: Uh-hmm.

Brandon: That's good.

Julia: That's very good.

Eric: Yeah, this pamphlet, as you're reading it, the— you can see the big— the big, bold title piece on the front, the title front. And also, there's a lot of preface with some biography. And it's all about like taking your time and making sure that you understand what's surrounding you. That everything's around you and you're all part of everything, and therefore, you should take your time and to see what's happening.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah. Doesn't seem very helpful.

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, normally, I would— I would follow the teachings of Dr. Radish Radish, but I do think that we should keep moving and not stop to read this book.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah, I cared more when I thought it might be Umbi.

Eric: [dog noises] And the dog hops out of your shirt and lands directly on top of the pamphlet. And then hear— [explosion] I'm going to need you to make a Dexterity check, Troy.

Brandon: Did you blow up the pumpkin?

Julia: You're dexterous.

Amanda: Oh, it's a Nat 20.

Brandon: Oh!

Julia: Oh, fuck yeah. Fuck yeah. The dog is safe.

Brandon: Or that— was that for Troy and Eric rolled for the dog?

Julia: The dog is safe, Eric.

Eric: Yeah, I rolled for the dog. I got a 23.

Brandon: Okay, good.

Julia: Everyone's safe and everything's fine.

Amanda: Like father, like son. I also got— I got a 25 after all my bonuses.

Eric: Incredible.

Julia & Brandon: Aw.

Eric: So Troy— both Troy and— and the pumpkin puppy, you are pushed back by force. You were thrown back into the side of the hedge maze, like into like one of the— just one of the wiggles and you're just like stuck there. But you'll take no damage and neither does the puppy.

Julia (as Cammie): Oh, thank God.

Amanda: Yay!

Eric: The way— it's the circumference of the wiggle just cradled you like a little— like a little dog.

Amanda: Yeah.

Amanda (as Troy): We're gonna talk a little bit about, like, learning and sniffing and stuff, and like you can do it for sure, but I wanna make sure you're safe, bud.

[dog noise]

Brandon: Do we need to, like, peel them off or something or, like—

Eric: Yeah.

Brandon: Okay.

Eric: Yeah, they're— oh, yeah, they're— they're firmly stuck into the side of the maze. There's also like a big hole now in the middle— in the middle of the pamphlet which we can look at if you'd like.

Brandon (as Umbi): Troy, oh, my God. What—

Brandon: And Umbi’s gonna run over and try to pull Troy out of the hedge maze.

Eric: Cool. Make a Strength Check.

Brandon: Come on.

Julia: I'm gonna go look in the hole.

Brandon: Old man strength, don't fail me now. Don't fail me now.

Eric: You need a good old man's strength.

Brandon: Well, Eric, that's a 5 minus 1 for a 4, baby.

Eric: Alright. Umbi, you're trying to pull Troy out and you can't. Troy is stuck— is firmly stuck in the hedge maze.

Julia: Oh, get the bad rolls out now, Brandon, because you have to roll next.

Eric (as Gloria): Or— although— and I could do it, too. I'm gonna do it, too.

Eric: Gloria wiggle— and tries to wiggle off, and is, like, hanging off of Troy's other foot.

Eric (as Gloria): Hold on. I need a better grip.

Eric: Wraps herself around Troy's foot.

Amanda: Oh.

Brandon: That's good.

Brandon (as Umbi): Thanks, Gloria.

Eric: Cammie, you can get closer if you want— if you like.

Julia: I— I want to cautiously look at the hole.

Eric: Okay. Cautiously looking at the hole, you can see there's two bottles with each one has a small bottle inside. And also, there's a tripwire that has been broken, probably from the puppy landing on top of it. There's like a tripwire underneath, kind of in the hole that connected inside of the pamphlet.

Julia: Are they broken/exploded, or are they salvageable?

Eric: The— you could try to salvage them. They are not broken. Only one— there's one that's exploded. They're like pieces everywhere for this thing.

Julia: Uh-hmm.

Eric: But the two other ones are just kind of sitting there.

Julia: Do they seem connected in some way, or does it seem like, for the most part, the trip wire has tripped?

Eric: Who can say? That's a good quest— that's a good question.

Julia: What was the blast radius, it seemed like, for the one?

Eric: Well, Troy ran up ahead with the doggy, so—

Julia: Okay.

Eric: —I think that— I—

Brandon: Would you say it's a 15-foot diameter?

Eric: I would— you know, Brandon, I might say it's a 15-foot diameter. That's right.

Julia: Coolio.

Eric: Yeah.

Julia: I think what Cammie is going to do is back up about 30 feet.

Eric: Uh-huh.

Julia: I look at the bottle—

Eric: Uh-huh.

Julia: —and go—

Julia (as Cammie): [giggles] Come here.

Julia: And cast Scurry on it.

Eric: Now, Julia, much like the Burger King, you can have it your way. Would you like little—little eyes on these models as well?

Julia: No, just little feet. I think it's more fun when they just have little feet.

Eric: Just little feet?

Amanda: So cute.

Eric: For the— for these, I feel like they're just like—like little stick figure legs with, like, little feet on them and they go [ringing] and they go [glass ringing]

Amanda: This pleases me so much.

Eric: Can you make investigat— make an Investigation Check for me.

Brandon: Investigation?

Amanda: Ooh.

Julia: Not very good. So that's a 12.

Eric: 12. They go [glass ringing] and then you see as they're running towards you, there is still a wire attached from them to the other ones and then they both go— [explosion]

Amanda: So smart.

Eric: And they both just— [explosion] and now the bottles exploded.

Brandon: Incredible.

Amanda: May I say, Eric? I'm really enjoying your foley work in this episode.

Brandon: Now, I do just want to point out— or ask Julia, how does it feel to get some of the— the vibes from Eric's I made your target sentient and then killed them, how does that feel?

Amanda: They didn't say, "Ow, don't hurt me."

Julia: Yeah. They said— they didn't say— “Oh, I'm in existence now and it's painful.” No, they just grew legs, and they ran, and then they exploded. I feel nothing. I feel nothing!

Brandon: I'm just trying to bring you onto my team. We're trying to co— connect.

Eric: In both situations, you were the ones who brought them to life. I need to make this very clear.

Julia: Alright. We should— let's pull Troy out and continue on.

Eric: No, it's alright. I rolled a— I rolled a 19 against your Investigation Check. So, unfortunately, you came down on it. But yes, now, the bottles have done exploded.

Julia: Okay, good.

Brandon (as Umbi): Well, Cammie, can you help us with Troy here, and the pup, please?

Julia (as Cammie): I mean, I can try, but I don't know.

Brandon (as Umbi): I mean, it's probably better than my— my bicep—

Brandon: Which Umbi flexes and then, like, the biceps goes up and then it falls down.

Amanda: It's concave, yeah.

Eric: Yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): I probably— is about the same, I would say, if not, worse.

Julia: She'll go over, and try to pull Troy out, and also say—

Julia (as Cammie): Troy, can you, like, help at all?

Amanda (as Troy): Oh, yeah.

Amanda: Troy tries to do a crunch.

Julia (as Cammie): I don't know if that's helpful, but alright.

Julia: I'll— I'll do a Strength Check.

Eric: Yeah, do a Strength Check.

Amanda: Can I help at all?

Eric: Yeah, you can do Strength Check as well.

Julia: How about a 6 minus 1 for a 5? Is that good?

Eric: Three— three people pulling on Troy Riptide. Troy, as—

Amanda: Too buff.

Eric: —as he is cartoonishly smooshed into—

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: —the side of this maze.

Brandon: It's too slippery. It's just too slippery.

Amanda: Happily, Troy got a— a 13 plus 1 for a 14.

Eric: Okay. Yeah, you can— you can wiggle one foot off to make it easier, to get some leverage. I think at this point, it takes you like 15 minutes to pull Troy— to fully pull Troy and the pup off of the hedge.

Julia: Inconvenient.

Amanda (as Troy): We'll— we'll work on this, we'll work on training, I— I promise.

Brandon (as Umbi): I think I might be dying.

Amanda (as Troy): Alright.

Julia (as Cammie): I think you just had to stop trying so hard.

Brandon (as Umbi): Oh.

Julia (as Cammie): You know, like once— once I try something and it's too difficult, I just stop.

Eric (as Gloria): On the other hand, I would say do the exact opposite, and keep trying, and try hard enough, and then you can just do that.

Julia (as Cammie): Gloria, I like you.

Amanda (as Troy): Gloria, do you want to, like, point us in the— in a good direction?

Eric (as Havana): I can try, yeah, if you want me to try.

Brandon (as Umbi): Do you have a— do you have a good Survival Check Bonus?

Eric (as Gloria): I can—

Julia (as Cammie): You seem wise.

Amanda (as Troy): You seem wise.

Eric (as Gloria): Yeah, no, I can try. I'll do— I'll do my best. Alright. I think we should go this way.

Julia: And she points—

Brandon: Ya, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta, ta.

Eric: Oh, boy. I did— well, no. Actually no, I got a— I got an 11.

Brandon: Okay.

Eric: So I get— we get one point.

Brandon: Okay. That's not bad.

Julia: Oh, that's great. We're on three. How many do we need for Havana, three?

Amanda: Three.

Eric: Three.

Julia: Alright, excellent.

Eric: Where we encounter a— a denizen of the hedges or you're in a bad place.

Eric (as Gloria): Oh, we go this way and then that way, and then this way, and— yeah, no, this makes sense.

Brandon (as Umbi): Let's wiggle!

[theme]

Amanda: Hello, it's Amanda. I am recording this in advance before going out to PAX Unplugged, where I just know that I'm going to see so many cool dice and items of cosplay, and perhaps another of the favorite pins that I grabbed last year, which says plant witch. Welcome to the mid-roll. And welcome and thank you especially to our newest patron, Gabe. We can only make the show because of you, Gabe. You Gabe only, only Gabe. No, I'm just kidding. And also the other hundreds and hundreds of people who give us support on Patreon each month. You can either sign up for a monthly plan, paying as little as five bucks a month to support the show, or make one payment for the whole dang year. Maybe you want it as a gift for yourself, maybe a gift for somebody else. Maybe, I don't know, you buy like a family pack. There's no family packs, you could just buy like four or five memberships and give it to all your closest friends. That would be an incredible present. We try to make it really worth your while with things like our bi-weekly party planning podcast or patron-only Discord, and all kinds of other benefits including ad-free episodes, by the way. You can join us today at patreon.com/jointhepartypod. This week in Multitude, we have all kinds of stuff going on, including getting ready for a brand-new episode in just two days' time of Tell Me About It. This is, of course, a game show about proving the things you like are actually interesting. Hosted by our own Eric and Adal Rifai of Hello From The Magic Tavern and Hey Riddle Riddle. Adal plays an eccentric billionaire who forces his guests to come on the show and prove that their favorite thing is interesting and cool, and we tested this concept to its limits when Eric allowed me to come on and talk about retirement plans. But, no, there have been so many incredible episodes, including some voices you may recognize, like Janet Varney, aka Korra herself, Jenna Stoeber, Jeffrey Cranor, Matt Young, me, Julia, Mischa, and way more. New episodes come out every other Thursday. Listen to Tell Me About It now in your podcast app or tmaipod.com. This show is sponsored by BetterHelp. I've been doing a lot of thinking about gift-giving this year. We have tried some different things in my family. This year, we're trying for like cards and kind of spending quality time together, instead of physical gifts. And I am on the other side of the family organizing a 25-person gift exchange among— about half of my aunts, uncles, and cousins. Because it's really fun, and we're doing it for like 30 bucks or less, and it's gonna be a really good time. But it requires a lot of, like, forward planning and thinking about what's important to you, communicating that to people around you, all stuff that's really tough. And I know that I am, in particular, appreciating the chance to talk all of this stuff through in therapy, with my therapist. And if you are somebody who has been thinking about starting therapy, not sure how to start, maybe you can't access therapy in person where you are, BetterHelp is a really good option to know about. All you have to do is fill out a brief questionnaire to get matched with a licensed therapist and you can switch therapists at any time for any reason if you don't vibe, whatever you want, for no additional charge. So in the season of giving, give yourself what you need with BetterHelp. Visit betterhelp.com/jointheparty today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P, .com/jointheparty. And finally, we are sponsored this week by Twenty Sided Store, who we got the chance to hang out with last weekend at PAX Unplugged in Philadelphia. It was so amazing hanging out with Lauren and Luis, they are the absolute best. Usually, Eric and I see them and we're getting soup dumplings or seeing the movies, or going to visit Twenty Sided in Williamsburg, Brooklyn, which is just filled with the most incredible stuff. And they have helpfully selected a bunch of really useful gifts. So if you want to get somebody into games, get a game for a kid or a friend's kid who's in your life, maybe you want to like class up your— I don't know chess or backgammon set with a beautiful, classy wooden edition that you'll be proud to put out on your shelf. All kinds of incredible stuff. I'm honestly still thinking about the 11 D4 for rolling damage on Magic Missile that I shouted out last time. So you got to check them out. If you come through New York this holiday season, go to Twenty Sided in Williamsburg and just mention Join the Party for a 20% discount. But good news everybody else, you can shop online at twentysidedstore.com. That's twenty, all spelled out, sidedstore.com and use the code Pirate for 20% off your order. Alright. Now, let's get back to the show.

[theme]

Eric: As she leads you through the maze, there is a chasm just right— right in front of you. Once again, it leads to absolutely nowhere. It is 20 feet away.

Julia: The chasm is 20 feet away or the ca— the space between sides of the chasm is 20 feet?

Eric: So it's flush against the hedge maze—

Julia: Uh-hmm.

Eric: —and then like there's 20 feet ahead of where you're going to go. You don't have to go this way, but you won't— you won't get the point because you're kind of retracing your steps.

Brandon: Is there a rickety bridge that we can cross?

Eric: There's no rickety bridge this time. Now, there's nothing. It's just a 20-foot chasm.

Brandon: Oh, 20-foot wide, so we have to, like, jump 20 feet, potentially?

Julia: We're not gonna jump. There's no way in hell.

Eric: Yeah, 20 feet. Yeah.

Brandon: Oh, fuck.

Amanda: I got nothing that could help us.

Julia: You have your arrow.

Amanda: I used my friendship arrow already.

Julia: You can't use it more than once?

Amanda: Correct.

Julia: Damn.

Brandon: I'm out of potions.

Julia: I don't have enough to fly us over.

Brandon: I can teleport over, but I can only do me.

Julia: Yeah. Oh, I can Misty Step. That is also an option for me.

Brandon: I could throw a bomb at the thing, will that help?

Julia: I don't think a bomb would— would help.

Amanda: I think we should probably retrace our steps.

Brandon: You don't think a bomb thrown into an endless cavern would do anything, Julia?

Julia: I don't think so.

Brandon: Oh, it's weird.

Julia: I could be wrong, but—

Amanda: Yeah.

Julia: Can I do an Arcana Check and see if this is like just a chasm?

Brandon: Oh, yeah.

Eric: Sure. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Brandon: What if it's one of those an— yeah, it has an invisible Pokemon bridge.

Amanda: The Kecleon.

Julia: What is my Arcana?

Amanda: That's the invisible chameleon Pokemon.

Julia: 13 plus 4 for a 17. [dice roll] Not rolling super hot this episode.

Amanda: Anything hinky going on?

Julia: Something hinky's going on.

Brandon: Something hinky.

Eric: How would you test this? How would you do this? Explain to me how this would happen.

Julia: I'd sniff at it, and if I smelled any magic, I would turn, and Cammie would say—

Julia (as Cammie): Troy, can I borrow some of that sawdust that you always carry around?

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.

Amanda: And Troy turns his hip to the side, and opens one of his pockets, and there's two handfuls of sawdust.

Julia: And Cammie reaches their hand in, pulls it out, and just blows on it to spread it across the chasm. Is that good for you?

Eric: Revealing it— revealing itself is a winding path through the chasm, going this way, and going this way, and that.

Julia: I solved the D&D puzzle!

Amanda: Yay!

Brandon: See, I thought you were just gonna take like a hot cup of tea, and blow the steam, and then have it condense on the pattern, but no, we went with sawdust and like—

Amanda: Much better, much better.

Julia: I wanted to yes and Amanda's joke from three episodes ago.

Amanda: Yay!

Julia: So can we traverse with the path that I've discovered?

Eric: Yes. Okay. The sawdust reveals a winding path through the chasm. It is still very narrow. It's only the space of one person walking at a time. Like, the ice puzzle in Pokemon, it goes up and left, and up, and right, and back, and all around, it's on a straight line. You can take it carefully, or you can try to do it quickly and you have to make some checks.

Julia: I think I want to do it carefully and I think Cammie will be like—

Julia (as Cammie): Alright, everyone, follow behind me.

Brandon: I would like to first just try to throw teleportation bomb, because that will be much safer for me.

Eric: Yeah, sure. Yeah, make an Attack Roll.

Brandon: Okay, okay, okay, okay.

Amanda: This is a fun puzzle. Very Pokemon gym.

Brandon: 14 plus 5 for 19.

Julia: Pretty good.

Eric: Yeah, dude. You toss it over and— and Umbi goes womp.

Brandon: Okay. So Umbi takes a neon green bomb out of his— out of his utility belt, gives us a little kiss, and says—

Brandon (as Umbi): Don't fail me now.

Brandon: Tosses it, and it's up on the other platform.

Eric: Just do— yeah, do an Intelligence Check for me.

Brandon: Okay, cool. It don't matter, Eric, because I rolled a 19 plus 3 for 22, baby.

Eric: Alright, 22.

Julia: Woo.

Eric: Hey, dude. So the bombs are in your hand, right?

Brandon: Uh-hmm.

Eric: The bombs are in your hand? Umbi, what do your bombs look like?

Brandon: Well, you described them in the hold, so they are like a glass sphere with a smaller—

Eric: Uh-hmm.

Brandon: —glass sphere. Each of them has—

Eric: Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm.

Brandon: —a reagent, and then a little like— almost conical thing—

Eric: Yeah.

Brandon: —where you put the explosive bits. And then—

Eric: Uh-hmm.

Brandon: —when it explodes, they mix and explode.

Eric: Uh-hmm. And it look— and that's what those other bombs before also look like?

Brandon: Yeah. And this one, the—the reagent is like a neon green powder.

Eric: Okay. Cool. Alright. Those bombs, the ones from before—

Brandon: Uh-hmm.

Eric: —oh, those are impact bombs. They're very similar to yours. These do force damage, and they throw creatures in the blast radius, they throw them back up against stuff when they get—when they get hit with them.

Brandon: Okay. Does my 22 give me any sense of like, why or who would have put these in there?

Eric: Well, here's another thing. There are plenty of different ways you can do bombs, right?

Brandon: Uh-hmm.

Eric: You do this Jagermeister version where you drop a shot into a beer sort of thing, right?

Brandon: Right, right, right.

Eric: These are your type of bombs.

Brandon: So Umbi says—

Brandon (as Umbi): Did I put those bombs there?

Julia: Well, Brandon, it was in a Dr. Radish Radish—

Amanda: Pamphlet.

Julia and Brandon: —Pamphlet.

Amanda: It's possible.

Brandon (as Umbi): Weird.

Eric: Then you are mid-throw, you tossed the bomb and you go womp, and you're 30— you're 30 feet on the other side of the chasm.

Amanda: I love this realization as like a cutscene as Umbi hefts the bomb out of his— his bag and, like, into the air.

Brandon: Yeah. It's like in the— I don't know if anyone's ever seen this in Star Trek, but sometimes you can see inside a transporter, so it's like mid-womp. I'm like—

Eric: Yeah, mid-womp.

Brandon: —did I put those bombs there?

Eric: You're like— you're holding it, you're like, "I know how to throw this. Wait a second.” It's out of your hand— then it's out of your hand.

Brandon: Is there any— can I do any like help action while I'm on the side, like sort of help guide them through? Would that'd be helpful at all?

Eric: If people feel like doing it faster then you ca— then I guess so.

Brandon: Cool.

Eric: But if you— you guys want to take it careful, that's fine.

Brandon: You know what I'll do, if they take it carefully, I'll just keep my head on a swivel and look out for the Harvester.

Julia: Smart.

Eric: Okay, cool. Hey, Cammie and Umbi, do a Perception Check.

Brandon: I got a 13 plus three for 16.

Julia: I got an 18 plus 3 for 21.

Eric: Cammie, coming around the bend, moving faster than you've seen them move before, almost with stalking, sullen anger, coming around the corner, you see the Harvester moving with purpose.

Julia: I cast Hideous Laughter on them.

Amanda and Brandon: Yay!

Julia: Make a Wisdom Saving Throw, please.

Eric: A real classic. You're really throwing classic spells at me.

Julia: I'm doing my best.

Eric: [dice roll] I got a 5 on the dice, so—

Julia: Great. The target is now going to fall prone, become incapacitated and unable to stand for the duration.

Brandon: Oh, man.

Eric: Because I'm laughing too hard?

Julia: Yes.

Eric: Alright. Immediately— so running, hustling at you with purpose, you hear—

[haunting Harvester laughter]

Julia: That's horrifying. I love it.

Eric: Just on— on their— on their knee, now down on their weird— on their weird root knees, double— doubled over. How do you laugh without a mouth?

Brandon: [haunting Harvester laughter]

Julia: Yes, like that.

Brandon: Like this.

Julia: It's really good. I like it a lot.

Eric: Hey, send me a recording of this as your text tone for your mom, and I'll send you something.

Amanda: Eric will Venmo you $5.

Eric: I will Venmo you $5.

Brandon: You're gonna get fired from any job you have if that's your text tone.

Julia: Well, Eric, one more thing before I— I continue down the— the path.

Eric: Uh-hmm.

Julia: He's still carrying his scythe, huh?

Eric: Yes, although, the Harvester is prone, but still is holding on to their scythe.

Julia: Excellent.

Julia (as Cammie): [giggles] Go away.

Julia: And Scurry on the scythe again.

Amanda: Yay!

Eric: What do I do for— what do I do for Scurry?

Amanda: Send into the chasm.

Julia: Oh, yeah. Amanda, great point. Basically, it says so the object animates, wriggles free of its owner if it has one sprout, two legs, and moves 20 feet in a direction you choose.

Eric: Yeah. Okay. Do I— did we do millipede legs first?

Julia: Yes.

Amanda: Yeah.

Julia: It was so scary.

Eric: We did millipede legs? Yeah. Millipede-- once again grows millipede legs. Yeah, I'm going to do a Strength Check, so there's— the Harvester is gonna hold on to it. [dice roll] The Harvester reaches out one of their weir— one of their weird rooty— rooty—

Brandon: Fresh and fruity.

Eric: —kinda sorta hands. And then you see that extra thorns are growing off of it, extending out and sticking into the scythe to pull it back. I had to use a legendary resistance, you absolute motherfucker.

Julia: Cool, cool, cool, cool.

Eric: So no, the— they're holding on to the scythe, but still doubled over trying to grab at it, because I have disadvantage, because I'm— because I've doubled over. Yeah, but these rose thorn vines are holding on to the scythe for you.

Brandon (as Umbi): Come on. Come on, move faster. Let's go.

Julia: I'm also saying I'm holding Concentration on Hideous Laughter.

Eric: That's fine.

Julia: So he has to, at the end of each of his turns, make another Wisdom Save in order to get up.

Eric: Yeah, no, that's fine.

Julia: Okay, cool, cool, cool.

Eric: That's fine. Yeah.

Julia: Just making sure.

Eric: No, that's fine. Yeah, while you were— are going as quickly as possible—

Julia: Quickly but safely.

Eric: —through the— and safely through the invisible maze, everyone give me their AC really quickly.

Julia: 12.

Amanda: 13.

Brandon: 13.

Amanda: I don't like how many die Eric is rolling.

Brandon: Yeah, it's a lot of dice you're rolling.

Amanda: Tough. I think for flavor, Troy and Cammie are doing a little like choo choo train, like nursery school kids with Gloria, like she's got her friend on Cammie's shoulder and Troy is respectfully supporting her back half.

Julia: Nice. He's touching that old lady's butt.

Brandon: Respectfully.

Julia: Respectfully.

Eric: Cool. Cammie and Troy, please take 13 points of damage while still laughing hysterically, pulls their scythe back using their thorn whip arm, they whip the whip back, and throw thorns at all four of you as best as they can, and it makes contact with Cammie and Troy.

Brandon: Nice. Was I just too far away?

Eric: You were— yes, I did it in a particular order.

Brandon: Nice.

Eric: It went Cammie, Gloria, Troy, and Umbi because Umbi was the farthest, especially because you just gave me the order that you were running with.

Amanda: That's what I—

Eric: And I rolled a bunch with— I had to roll with disadvantage—

Amanda: Oh.

Brandon: Uh-hmm.

Eric: —so I only hit you twice.

Brandon: Nice.

Eric: Hell yeah. And then Cammie, give me the roll for Concentration.

Julia: I never remember the Concentration rules. [dice roll]. What do I have to hit for that?

Eric: Constitution Saving Throw, the DC is just 10.

Julia: Okay. I got a 13 plus 2 for a 15.

Eric: Alright. You're keeping it going and you're still laughing even with— all of a sudden, growing these thorns. Hell yeah. But y'all can keep going if you'd like.

Julia: We're gonna get out of here.

Eric: Get out of here.

Amanda: And we have three points, so should we reunite?

Julia: Yes. I think we should get Havana and then get the fuck out.

Eric: Absolutely. In this final moment, how are you finding Havana? How are you using your heart?

Amanda (as Troy): My brother!

Brandon: Exactly. It's slow motion like a fucking war movie, like Saving Private Havana, where Umbi is just like—

Brandon (as Umbi): Gooo, Goooo.

Amanda (as Troy): My brruuuuuv.

Brandon: As vines are whipping past us all, and we're trying to run— run across this invisible chasm.

Eric: Just thorn shooting past all of you. Somewhere in the distance is a World War I Kaiser German shooting a machine gun at you.

Amanda: Yeah, no, it's just— it's just following the Heart of the Cards and— and trying to find our bruv. And, now that the Harvester knows where we are, Troy has no problem yelling.

Eric: Okay. Your plaintive cries of your bruv bounce through the hedges, you hear in response an ear-splitting— [roars]

Julia: Oh, no.

Eric: As you come to a dead forest.

Brandon: Oh, no.

Eric: Bare trunks, and craggily branches, not a leaf in this entire space. Without leaves, you can surely see a lot of things in this barren glade. You can see Havana really quickly. Havana is curled up as much as he can, and sitting in a type of, I don't know, makeshift nest, kind of in the crown of one of the— of a large craggy tree. And standing in the nest next to Havana, who's trying to just like stay— trying to stay as perfectly still next to this creature, it has the wings of a moth, a body of a sprouting garlic bulb, the head of a bird of paradise flower with like the wei— like the petals with the weird be— with the weird beak.

Amanda: Uh-hmm. Little mouth.

Eric: And the claws of a sticky burdock, one of those balls of things that stick to your legs when you run through the woods.

Julia: How's the— how's the butt?

Eric: The butt? Well, that's where the garlic ball is sprouting, it's the green.

Amanda: Ah.

Julia: Okay, naturally.

Eric: Those are the green. That's— that's the tail. And it is standing over its nest, squawking at you. Folks, this— this is like the boss battle text, this is Grafted Flight.

Amanda: Ooh. I'm just gonna say the Greenfolk Gorgon, that's so much better.

Julia: Cammie looks at it and goes—

Julia (as Cammie): It's beautiful.

Eric: [roars]

Julia (as Cammie): A majestic creature.

Eric: [roars]

Brandon: It's like throwing up acid like a vulture.

Eric: It's like— it's like— yeah.

Amanda: Sap, yeah.

Eric: Like, yeah, it's— and— and then like vomits sap on the ground— on the ground of it— of its nest, making it extra sticky. [roars]

Brandon: Question, Eric?

Eric: Yeah.

Brandon: Do you think for—

Eric: Oh, can I give you an answer? [roars]

Brandon: Do you think for my explosive missile, where I can put a bomb on that arrow and knock it and shoot it—

Eric: Uh-hmm.

Brandon: —can it be any type of bomb or is it only just a regular old bomb?

Eric: No, any type of— I think it's any type of bomb.

Brandon: Oh.

Eric: Havana says—

Eric (as Havana): Oh, hey— oh, hey what's up? I'm fine. I'm keeping it cool— I'm keeping it in chilly. I'm— I'm keeping it in the crisper.

Julia (as Cammie): Are you its baby now?

Eric (as Havana): Maybe. Yeah, maybe. I— I haven't— you found me pretty quickly, so I haven't negotiated where it's at— where this thing is at, but nice to see you all again.

Amanda (as Troy): We came for you straight away, bud.

Eric (as Havana): Thank— thank you. Cool puppy.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah, you guys are gonna meet later. It's gonna be really cute. This is Gloria, she’s our friend. I'm going to take care of this bird for you. Alright?

Brandon (as Umbi): Get ready to move, Havana.

Amanda (as Troy): Yup.

Julia (as Cammie): Wait, wait, before we do that, should we just give it another baby?

Brandon (as Umbi): Do you have a baby?

Amanda (as Troy): If you're thinking about my puppy, you can go to hell.

Julia (as Cammie): Troy, you just met the puppy.

Amanda (as Troy): Never.

Julia (as Cammie): We already know—

Amanda (as Troy): Never.

Julia (as Cammie): —and love Havana Tropicana.

Amanda: Troy turns to Umbi—

Amanda (as Troy): What are we going to do, boss?

Brandon (as Umbi): Um--

Julia (as Cammie): Wow!

Eric: Gloria turns to Cammie and says—

Eric (as Gloria): You are— you are stone cold.

Brandon (as Umbi): For real. I— I— I thought I was the murderous one over here in the pirate crew.

Julia (as Cammie): I— murder? It— it wants a baby.

Eric (as Gloria): I don't— hell yeah, dude. I— I love it. I love the vibe— damn— damn dog. Damn.

Julia (as Cammie): I didn't say feed the— the thing. I didn't say feed the majestic creature the puppy. I said give it a new baby.

Eric (as Gloria): I can't believe you— you took me out of— of a curse that made me— made—turned me into a terrible monster when I was asleep and then immediately thereafter, no, let's give this puppy— let's give this puppy to the bird.

Brandon: I think you see Gloria and Troy and Umbi start taking a step away from Cammie.

Eric: No, Gloria— no, Gloria is there.

Amanda: Gloria is thinking.

Eric: Gayl— Gloria is standing right there.

Amanda: They're sidebarring. Umbi and Troy then sidebar like—

Amanda (as Troy): What are you thinking?

Brandon: Yeah, I think Umbi's gonna turn to Troy and say—

Brandon (as Umbi): Peanut butter and jelly?

Amanda (as Troy): Oh, yes.

Brandon: And I'm thinking one and— well, two fluid motions, as Troy goes to knock an arrow, Umbi's going to throw an oil bomb on top of the first arrow. Hopefully, we shoot and hit it.

Amanda: Uh-hmm.

Brandon: And then if that's successful, then I would like to do a second one and throw a regular bomb, a fire bomb, and see if we can light this bird on fire.

Eric: And light the dead trees on fire. Okay, sure. Yeah, dude.

Julia: I have— I have spells.

Brandon: Well, maybe you should have said that instead of trying to sacrifice the dog, Julia.

Eric: The puppy, yeah. Alright, let's do an attack roll first.

Julia: I have calm motion. I could frighten this creature so it goes away.

Amanda: That's alright.

Brandon: Why didn't you say that?

Julia: But I can't do anything about that once you attack it.

Eric: Okay.

Amanda: Alright.

Eric: Alright, let's see what happens.

Amanda: Well, first, Eric, how far away is the tree? Less than 100 feet?

Eric: Yeah, you're a 100— yeah, I'd say 100 feet is fine.

Amanda: Okay. Then I— I have a 14 to hit.

Eric: No, that goes wide left. Now, Troy, you are a trickshots man.

Amanda: I am.

Julia: Ding, ding.

Amanda: Considering the best—the best way to do this— yeah, so—

Eric: You just want to go again?

Amanda: No, no, yeah, I'm definitely gonna do it. So I'm gonna use my bonus action to reroll the attack roll with ricochet.

Eric: As it bounces off of one tree and bounces off.

Amanda: Well, it bounced off the branch behind the bird and then ricochets back.

Eric: Yeah.

Amanda: And that one is a Dex, that's a 17 to hit, a 13 plus 4.

Eric: That hits, that hits.

Brandon: Yeah.

Amanda: Excellent.

Eric: Wow. Alright.

Amanda: So, that arrow hit the tree, and then bounced back, and hit the bird. Maybe for flavor, the oil got a little bit on the tree, a little bit on the bird. Who can say?

Eric: Yeah, what kind of oil is this? Olive, grape seed?

Brandon: You know, I think it's—

Eric: Wha— what— what's the smoke point of this?

Brandon: I think it's pretty low. I think this is a special kind of oil that Umbi has sort of cultivated from a—

Julia: It's Pawpaw oil.

Amanda: Out back the Outback Steakhouse.

Brandon: This is the leftover cooking oil from the Outback—

Amanda: Yes.

Brandon: —Steakhouse that they—

Julia: Make sense.

Brandon: — need a way to use it.

Amanda: A Blooming Onion flower.

Eric: Right. Yeah.

Brandon: Yeah. This is clearly just a recyclable responsible thing to do with cooking oil.

Eric: This is Blooming Onion flower oil?

Amanda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Eric: Yeah. Yeah, for sure.

Brandon: Thank you, Amanda. That was brilliant.

Eric: So bloosh— bloosh— does the oil do damage?

Brandon: No.

Amanda: So that was the peanut butter, now it's time for the jelly.

Brandon: It's time for the jelly.

Amanda: Troy's gonna roll to hit again.

Eric: Oh, my God.

Amanda: Alright. It's a 17 plus 4 to hit for a 21.

Julia: Oh, my God.

Brandon: Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.

Julia: Jeeze—

Eric: Hold on, hold on. Give me a second.

Julia: Jeezy creezy.

Eric: No, I rolled too low.

Julia: Cammie goes—

Julia (as Cammie): This majestic creature, no! It just wants a baby.

Amanda (as Troy): No, Cammie.

Eric: Troy.

Amanda: Yeah?

Eric: I have to— I have to narrate this.

Amanda: Okay.

Eric: Cammie goes, "Hey, what if we gave up your puppy?" And then you, Troy, turns away to Umbi, and Umbi is like, "Got it." Slaps a bomb— slaps a bomb in the arrow. The arrow goes by the bird, bounces off of a tree, and hits it in the back, goes sploosh.

Amanda: Yes.

Eric: And then— and then Troy is like, "Okay.” Slaps another bomb. And that goes— [explosion] cause it's incendiary,

Amanda: Yes.

Eric: It's immediately incendiary.

Amanda: Yes.

Julia: I— this is literally the meme of the I've had this puppy for five minutes, but I'll kill everyone—

Amanda: Yeah.

Julia: —if anything happens to him.

Amanda (as Troy): Oh, Havana, jump.

Brandon: I— I tell— I said to Havana, get ready to move.

Amanda: Yeah.

Brandon: What this does, by the way— so it's coated in oil.

Eric: Uh-huh.

Brandon: We shot a regular bomb at it, which is fire damage. So the regular bomb does 1D10 plus 3.

Eric: Yeah.

Brandon: And then for the oil, it takes an extra D6 fire damage for each dice of fire damage rolled up to a maximum of half my Alchemist level.

Eric: Cool.

Amanda: Nice.

Brandon: So 1D10 plus 1D6, is that what that is?

Amanda: Yes. So I rolled a D10, and I got a 3, plus your intelligence modifier of 3 for 6.

Brandon: Yes.

Amanda: And then I'll roll a D6.

Julia: 6, 6, 6, 6.

Amanda: It's a 6.

Julia: Yeah.

Amanda: That's 12 points of damage.

Eric: 12 points of damage? And it's just on fire, right?

Julia: Yeah.

Eric: It's just on fire?

Brandon: I assume. That's up to you, I think, but yes.

Eric: Okay. It's just—

Amanda: I'm not sure how to calculate that. I—

Eric: And continues to be on fire. There's oil on fire rolls for Dungeons & Dragons.

Amanda: Well, yeah.

Eric: That's fine. Havana falls out of the tree.

Julia: That feels alright.

Amanda: Troy is gonna run over, pick him up.

Eric: He's in the— he falls out of the tree as everything goes— starts to go up in flames. Guess what also goes up in flames, my friends? This dead tree forest goes— [engulfed in flames]

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: It just goes up in flames.

Amanda (as Troy): Come on, Havana.

Julia: Cammie sighs.

Eric (as Havana): Why— why would you do— why would you do this?

Brandon (as Umbi): It's called a rescue.

Eric (as Havana): I didn't need to be rescued.

Amanda (as Troy): Quickly, we need you.

Eric (as Havana): I don't— lots of things— multiple people need me right now.

Amanda (as Troy): Okay, but we're your crew. Come on, run!

Julia (as Cammie): Did you want to stay with the bird, Havana?

Eric (as Havana): I was gonna stay with the bird.

Julia (as Cammie): Oh.

Amanda (as Troy): Sorry, not allowed, not your Path. Come on.

Eric (as Havana): You don't know what my Path is.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah, I do. I have a puppy now.

Eric (as Havana): I was flung out of the sky, and the bird grabbed me, and brought me back to its nest.

Amanda (as Troy): To eat.

Julia (as Cammie): That's beautiful.

Eric (as Havana): Now, who said to eat?

Amanda (as Troy): Me.

Eric (as Havana): Says you?

Amanda: Yeah. Is he running?

Eric: No, Havana's not running. No, then fire is just going up. Fire is coming up around you.

Amanda: Troy exchanges a look with Cammie and Umbi.

Julia (as Cammie): I think we acted too hastily. Don't look at me.

Brandon (as Umbi): You wanted to give the bird a dog!

Eric (as Gloria): Yeah, it was stone cold. Absolutely, stone cold.

Eric (as Havana): You wanted to give the bird the puppy? I'm the— I— you didn't have to do that.

Julia (as Cammie): Well, I was gonna exchange a baby for baby.

Julia: Cammie look so like wide-eyed and innocent at Havana.

Eric (as Havana): You're in the— don't give me that face!

Amanda: Troy is gonna run toward Havana.

Eric: Yeah. You can keep running towards Havana.

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: Yeah. As the flames— flames start picking up, a third of the— of the forest is now up in flames.

Amanda: Yeah. I am light-footed, so difficult terrain costs me no extra movement.

Eric: Good.

Amanda: So hopefully I can just kind of dodge around any falling flames. But no, I'm— I'm gonna run over there and grab Havana up if he's not going to come with me.

Eric: You are?

Amanda: Yeah.

Eric: Alright. Let's do it. Alright, I'm doing— let's do a Strength Check.

Amanda: Eric, what does my dice say?

Eric: Oh, that's a Natural One, isn't it?

Amanda: Yeah.

Julia: That's— that's rough, buddy.

Amanda: Yeah.

Brandon: Jesus Christ.

Julia: This is his Path, I guess.

Eric: I got more than that. Yeah. Havana pushes Troy off of him like—

Eric (as Havana): You're not— so— you don't know what my Path is. I was flung. I'm glad you came and found me, but I feel like this is what I have to do.

Julia (as Cammie): You ha—

Amanda (as Troy): Stay?

Julia (as Cammie): What do you have to do?

Eric (as Havana): I— Cammie, you have to leave now.

Julia (as Cammie): I'm working on it. You got flung, and I wanted to make sure you were okay.

Amanda (as Troy): Are you really staying behind?

Eric (as Havana): I don't—

Eric: Fire just consuming the— the trees next to him and the bird flapping its wings, it's big moth wings as hard as it can. Wind is whipping. [roars] Blowing out the fire on itself and trying to blow out the fire of the forest.

Julia (as Cammie): A majestic creature.

Eric (as Havana): When— when you have to make choices and be— multiple people want you to do different things, what do you do?

Julia (as Cammie): I make the choice that feels right to me.

Amanda (as Troy): Say no and be a pirate.

Eric (as Havana): I don't know what to do.

Amanda (as Troy): Who makes you feel safe?

Eric: Crackle, flames continue— flames continuing on.

Julia: Be careful, he might say the bird that caught him.

Brandon: I was gonna say, is it the bird that's on fire that makes you feel safe?

Eric (as Havana): I mean, the bird did ca— I was flung— but the— I was flung in the first place, but you were the ones that made me be flung in the first place.

Amanda (as Troy): I thought that was—

Eric (as Havana): 'Cause of the stuff you guys— and the stuff that you guys were doing.

Amanda (as Troy): I thought that was the Planter.

Julia (as Cammie): I think that was Troy, to be fair.

Eric (as Havana): I— he's count— he's one of you.

Amanda (as Troy): I fully stole this puppy, and I will answer for my crimes.

Eric (as Havana): You stole a puppy and Umbi woke her up. And Cammie, you— you— you shouldn't be here in the first place.

Amanda (as Troy): But she healed her.

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, I broke her curse.

Amanda (as Troy): She was cursed and Cammie healed her.

Eric (as Gloria): I was. I was asleep and when I woke up, it turned bad.

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.

Amanda (as Troy): Listen, bud, if you don't want to be our crew, I mean, that hurts— that hurts me, right— right here, but that's—

Eric (as Havana): I do want to be your crew, but I also want to do the right thing.

Amanda (as Troy): Come do the right thing with us.

Eric: Flames crackle, crackle, crackle, flames. Trees crackling, falling over around.

Amanda (as Troy): Gloria just re-learned about the Cascade, and she said, "Why won't someone fix it?" That's us, we're fixing it. Don't you want to fix it with us?

Julia (as Cammie): Havana, the decision is always yours, and I always operate on the idea that I should do the thing that does the most right by the most people. And if you think staying here is going to do the most right by the most people, then that's your Path and that's up to you to decide. But I also think that helping us bring the Cascade back and finding the salmon will bring a lot of good to a lot of people.

Amanda (as Troy): Well put.

Eric (as Havana): I hadn't— I hadn't thought of it that way.

[monster roars]

Julia (as Cammie): I'm so sorry. We're having a conversation. Can you just like— just a moment, please, and then we can figure this out.

[monster roars]

Amanda (as Troy): Hey, Umbi, do you have a thing that could, like, put out fires?

Brandon (as Umbi): I've never tried to do that before.

Julia: I've simply never tried to put out a fire in my life.

Eric: It can't be. That answer cannot be yes.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah. Why would you want to put out fire?

Eric: Yeah, the flames are coming clo— are surrounding Havana now, as the flames grab more than half of the dead forest.

Julia: I think Cammie looks at him and says—

Julia (as Cammie): It's your decision, Havana, and I respect whatever decision you make.

Julia: And then Cammie's gonna take a couple of steps forward, give him a little kiss on the forehead, and is going to turn, and walk in the direction of the exit of this grove. Through the flames, it's very cinematic.

Eric: Flames continue to burn everything around you while you walk out.

Brandon: Yeah, I mean, I think Umbi's right behind Cammie and just, like, puts a hand on Havana's shoulder and says—

Brandon (as Umbi): Do whatever you need to do, bro. It's been real.

Brandon: And walks out.

Julia: Aw.

Amanda: Yeah. Troy pets the puppy's head, then reaches past it to his inner pocket, and grabs the other half of the handkerchief that he gave—

Julia: Oh!

Eric: Threelips’ handkerchief?

Amanda: —Threelips, and tears it one more time, and tucks the little square into Havana's coat.

Julia: That's very sweet.

Amanda: Then he follows.

Eric: And Gloria wiggles after you. Your party walks out of the— the entrance to this— this forest clearing, flames and smoke billowing behind you. And as you keep walking forward, you hear the fast steps of someone running after you and the cry.

Eric (as Havana): I want to be a pirate!

Julia (as Cammie): Aw.

Amanda (as Troy): Yay!

Julia (as Cammie): Havana!

Eric: Havana is running. You also see, like, green light is being like kind of pulled out of the top of him. And he's like— his clothes which he was wearing like more conservative jacket and—

Julia: Like Path robes?

Eric: Yeah, the— yeah, this robe— the robe of the Path that he was wearing before. It's now returning to the shabby school shirt and pants that he wore when you first saw him.

Julia: Aw. He lost his divine magic.

Eric: Yeah, he lost his divine magic.

Julia: Aw, sweetie.

Eric: And he's running—

Eric (as Havana): I want to be in a crew with you guys.

Amanda (as Troy): Yay.

Amanda: And Troy's gonna hug him as they stumble toward another path.

Julia: Yeah.

Brandon: Yeah. Grou— big, ol' group hug, and the puppy is in the middle.

Amanda: Licking all our faces.

Eric: And over the sound of the crackle of a fire, as the fire consumes the entire dead forest, you hear: [roars]

Julia: Aw.

Brandon: I'm so glad we killed Mothra.

Amanda: I know, right?

Brandon: I don't know why Godzilla didn't try that.

Amanda: So, let's— we can make it back to the ship, hopefully.

Eric: Hell yeah. Alright.

Julia: And we got to ro— we got to get five more points.

Amanda: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Julia: Brandon, roll.

Amanda: Brandon, it's your turn.

Eric: Yeah, that's true. Let's go. Hell yeah.

Amanda: You and Havana.

Brandon: Okay. So as we exit the smoldering pile of bird and tree, I think Umbi's going to take the lead. And as if with a sage wisdom of age and time—

Eric: Hmm.

Brandon: —pointing towards the direction and say—

Brandon (as Umbi): That way.

Eric: Alright, give me a Survival Check.

Julia: Cammie goes—

Julia (as Cammie): Based on what? Based on what?

Amanda (as Troy): Okay, I mean that’s how we got here. It's fine.

Julia (as Cammie): Oh.

Brandon: Oh, hell yeah. I have a plus 0 to Survival, but I did roll an 18.

Amanda: Yay!

Eric: 18!

Julia: That's 2.

Eric: 2 points, baby, 2 points.

Julia: 2 points.

Brandon: And as— as they walk— start walking forward, Umbi looks back at Cammie and gives her— gives her a side-eye.

Julia (as Cammie): Fair— fair enough. Fair enough.

Amanda: Alright, alright.

Eric: Incredible. Alright. Yeah. You're making good time. You got two points there. We're now reset. Who wants to go?

Amanda: Havana hasn't gone.

Eric: Oh, Havana needs to go now.

Eric (as Havana): Alright, do I— so you want me to— do you want me to figure it out? I guess I did see it from above.

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah.

Amanda (as Troy): All crew.

Eric (as Havana): All crew, all crew,

Julia (as Cammie): And— and you get to choose your Path now.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah, this is called being supportive—

Julia (as Cammie): Woo.

Brandon (as Umbi): —of our crewmate.

Eric (as Havana): I mean, when you say it like that, it doesn't really feel supportive when you're like, "I'm being supportive." It's not— that's not really supportive.

Julia (as Cammie): Umbi, be supportive.

Brandon (as Umbi): That's true. That's a good point. Yeah.

Eric (as Havana): Yeah.

Brandon (as Umbi): No, criticism heard and taken.

Eric (as Havana): You know—

Brandon (as Umbi): —taken—

Eric (as Havana): —you know, I feel like we're all now at equal levels, and I have a lot of stuff to say to you, people.

Amanda (as Troy): Alright. Bruvs criticize bruvs, that's what happens. Bruvs correct bruvs.

Eric: Hell yeah. I got a— I got a Dirty 20, baby. That's two more points.

Julia: Woo!

Amanda: Yay!

Eric: And the entire time, Havana is just ripping into the three of you.

Amanda (as Troy): Go ahead. Go ahead.

Eric: Be like—

Eric (as Havana): Hey— hey, Troy. I— we said it before, I know that, like, everything is beautiful and wondrous to you, but it's like not all of us have the energy to support you and your journey of coming up-- Also, there's a lot of privilege of being a prince is coming out and learning, pretending that it's all your life. Like, some of us got thrown into the Great Salt Sea by our supposed friends.

Amanda (as Troy): You're right. Damn.

Julia (as Cammie): He got you there.

Amanda (as Troy): Alright. Alright.

Eric (as Havana): Yeah.

Brandon (as Umbi): I think it'd be a good idea to get Havana some— some grief therapy about that one incident when we get back to the Hold.

Eric (as Havana): Yeah. Hey, Cammie, why did you give me this book in the first place?

Julia (as Cammie): I don't know. It seemed like a good idea at the time.

Eric (as Havana): You gave it to me in the first place!

Julia (as Cammie): I think you can follow the Path, but not make that, like, your whole personality. But I realized now that you were in a vulnerable place when I suggested it, so that might not have been the best option for you.

Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, do me, do me, do me.

Eric (as Havana): Hey, just because you're old doesn't mean you don't say hurtful things 50% of the time. That's not an excuse. That's not an excuse.

Brandon (as Umbi): That's a little low, I think, right? 60—

Eric (as Havana): 70— you're such a dick. And you smell like green peppers.

Brandon (as Umbi): What? I smell like green peppers?!

Eric (as Havana): You knew— you knew that.

Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, fuck.

Eric (as Havana): You knew that.

Brandon (as Umbi): No, I didn't. I— oh, my God, guys, I'm so sorry.

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah, believe me--

Eric (as Havana): I know. And everyone was too polite to tell you. You've just smelled like green peppers for so long.

Brandon (as Umbi): Oh, my God!

Julia (as Cammie): We kind of just follow the scent of you a lot of times if we don't know where you are.

Amanda (as Troy): It's actually very helpful.

Brandon (as Umbi): What? Oh, guys—

Julia (as Cammie): Yeah. Or— or look for explosions.

Brandon (as Umbi): —I know that we're pirates and it takes a long— it's difficult for us to keep our hygiene on the boat, but I'm so sorry.

Julia: Can I roll Survival now?

Eric: Yes, you can roll Survival.

Julia: Cool. I think Cammie is like nodding at this whole conversation being like—

Julia (as Cammie): You tell them. You tell them, Havana.

Julia: And then it's going to look around and be like—

Julia (as Cammie): Huh.

Julia: And then consults the spirit lamp and be like—

Julia (as Cammie): What do you think? Which way?

Julia: Kind of hot and colds it around the different options and it goes—

Julia (as Cammie): Alright, here we go.

Brandon: Which I think we all know about it now that lamp—

Amanda: Yes. Now, the episodes have come out.

Brandon: —because we have listened to the episodes, but I don't think Cammie has told us about this lamp.

Eric: No. Cammie has not told you about the lamp.

Julia: Cammie has been carrying it the whole time.

Eric: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Brandon: So Um— yeah, I guess Umbi is just like—

Brandon (as Umbi): Whoa. That's a tight lamp. Where'd you get that?

Julia (as Cammie): Found it in the maze, might have been from another witch. Anyway—

Brandon (as Umbi): Oh.

Julia (as Cammie): —it's helpful.

Brandon (as Umbi): Cool.

Amanda (as Troy): I love when witches help each other.

Eric: Yeah, give me— give me the roll. Give me the roll, give me a roll, Survival. Come on, come on. come on.

Julia: Well, that's gonna be a 19 plus three for a 22.

Eric: Incredible. You're trying— you're— you're out at the end. I guess that's three points for Cammie.

Brandon: Yooo!

Eric: Cammie, because you— you rolled so high, remember Cammie gets three points when Cammie gets 18 or above, so now you have seven points.

Julia: Three points. Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Brandon: Oh, fuck yeah.

Amanda: Hang on.

Julia: Whoa, whoa.

Brandon: Oh.

Julia: Because we have extra, I would like something that is valuable and useful for the future.

Amanda: Yes.

Eric: Incredible. Of course, you do.

Amanda: Or two valuable things, if we want to exchange them for Amber.

Eric: I think at the end much like when you're new game plussing a game, you're just kind of getting extra points at the end here.

Julia: Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm.

Eric: So I'm just gonna give— if you use two points, I'll give you an Amber straight up.

Julia: Great. Give me.

Eric: Great.

Julia: Give me, give me.

Eric: Incredible.

Julia: We gave so many to fucking Drooz, give me my Ambers back.

Eric: There's a skeleton on the ground and the skeleton is a—

Julia: Cicada.

Eric: Yes. It's a cicada. It's inside of a cicada shell, clutching an Amber.

Julia: Cammie goes—

Julia (as Cammie): Ooh.

Julia: And then sticks a hand in and it, like, cracks, and pulls it back out—

Julia (as Cammie): Amber! I know that glisten anywhere.

Eric: Incredible. Boom. You got one more— you have one more Amber and now you want to use your final five?

All: Yes!

Eric: Incredible.

Brandon: As the maze is burning down behind us.

Eric: I know. Act— good. Actually, good point. You turn around, you see some smoke coming up behind you, but the— the hedge maze is fine.

Julia: Yeah.

Brandon: Oh.

Amanda: Huh.

Eric: It's fine— it's totally fine.

Brandon: That's good still, because I was curious if I could have just burned this maze down, but the answer is no.

Eric: No. No, Brandon. No— no, Brandon James Grugle. No, you can't.

Amanda (as Troy): I wonder if Commander Vineyard doesn't burn if you put fire near him. Huh.

Brandon: Hmm.

Eric: Hmm.

Julia (as Cammie): I think it's because he's so wet.

Amanda (as Troy): Yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): He would just smoke, you know?

Amanda (as Troy): Uh-hmm.

Brandon (as Umbi): Uh-hmm. Just like a white smoke, you know?

Amanda (as Troy): Hmm.

Julia (as Cammie): Uh-hmm.

Brandon (as Umbi): Yeah.

Eric: Umbi, you recognize the path from your— your drone shot that you have when you got thrown out of Eden. There's a final few turns leading out to the front, to the— the stone steps where you saw the full riddle of the keys for the first time.

Brandon: Fuck yeah.

Julia (as Cammie): Yay.

Amanda (as Troy): Yay.

Julia (as Cammie): We did it.

Julia: And Cammie holds up to the maze key.

Eric (as Havana): We did— we did it.

Brandon (as Umbi): We did it, we did it, we did it. We're better than the gods.

Eric: And then [swoosh] as you see a scythe cut into the hedge behind you. And you look at Gloria, and Gloria's body—

Amanda: No.

Eric: —the top half of Gloria's body—

Julia: No.

Eric: —slides—

Amanda: No!

Eric: —down and then you hear a— [swoosh] and standing in front of you, blocking your exit from the Divine Labyrinth is an incredibly pissed, seething, and growing, and growing, and growing is the Harvester for one last stand.

[theme]