Pow! Our super seniors get their first big project of the year: getting up close and personal with a bad guy. I’m sure they’ll be the top of their class on this one… unless there is a group of students who already has that designation.
We’re playing Masks for this campaign! You can access a running list of all the NPCs from Campaign 4 here.
The only way you can listen to an exclusive oneshot is if you grab the limited-edition JTP VINYL now!!
Sponsors
- Mage Hand Press, whose fantastic Valda’s Spire of Secrets is now available on D&D Beyond. Check out their work at magehandpress.com
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Cast & Crew
- Game Master, Co-Producer: Eric Silver
- Co-Host, Co-Producer, Sound Designer, Composer (Connor Lyons): Brandon Grugle
- Co-Host, Co-Producer (Shelley Craft): Julia Schifini
- Co-Host, Co-Producer (Rowan Rosen): Amanda McLoughlin
- Artwork: Allyson Wakeman
- Multitude: https://multitude.productions
About Us
Join the Party is an actual play podcast with tangible worlds, genre-pushing storytelling, and collaborators who make each other laugh each week. We welcome everyone to the table, from longtime players to folks who’ve never touched a roleplaying game before. Hop into our current campaign: the drama and excitement of a superhero high school! Or marathon our completed stories: Campaign 3 for a pirate story set in a world of plant- and bug-folk, the Camp-Paign for a MOTW game set in a weird summer camp, Campaign 2 for a modern superhero game, and Campaign 1 for a high fantasy story. And once a month we release the Afterparty, where we answer your questions about the show and how we play the game. New episodes every Tuesday.
Transcript
Amanda: Last time on Join the Party.
Eric: Our super teens defended the freshmen from Art AI, a robot whose only goal is to spray everything in the school with unwashable ink. They punched, they kicked, they shot it with lightning, it exploded. But we also learned about some mechanics in Masks, like if you can get your fellow players to do anything and what to do if they refuse. It was tough. We also learned that the electrical grid in the school was shorted out because of a big fight between two electric students who broke up. That's Joltin' Jo, who's like a league of their own style hero and Hoover Moover of an indeterminate gender and race, because they're mostly Hoover Dam up there and everywhere, honestly. The teens started their first class, Villain Studies, with Dr. Mohinder Ram, aka Moonboot, a former hero who went back to school, got a psych degree and teaches the senior seminar. Just so you know, there's no such thing as the multiverse. Hey, did you know there's a list of NPCs that Julia and I maintain with every single episode release? You can just check it out in the episode description, friends, enemies, frenemies, all that stuff. School is in session. Let's get this party started.
Eric: Hey, all you super friends. You want to get good together? You want to skip math together? You want to punch bad guys together? It's not that I haven't used my words, it's that nobody listens to me and I can shoot fire. 1, 2, 3, 4.
[theme]
Amanda: Eric, what is your character activation phrase for getting ready to GM Masks?
Eric: I just need to start with the comic book cover.
Julia: Hell yeah.
Brandon: You could just describe Connor's boob window, if you want.
Eric: Does Connor have a boob window?
Amanda: Oh, he's got a little mesh?
Brandon: I don't know.
Eric: I can't— you can't shrug. I'm asking you.
Brandon: It's invisible, so who can say?
Amanda: You know, I feel like Connor and Row have definitely had discussions about the merits of tattoos and Row is like—
Amanda (as Rowan): You could just, like, cover the whole skin, you know? Then it would make it not opaque anymore. Not that I want to, like, change who you are, but, like, I just think sometimes it'll make you a little bit more comfortable."
Brandon: That's a good question.
Julia: That actually would look dope.
Brandon: I wonder if I got a tattoo, if it would also disappear.
Amanda: Hmm.
Brandon: Because it's—
Julia: I don't know.
Brandon: —technically part of my skin at that point, right?
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: Like, it's underneath the—
Amanda: It's subdermal.
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: We'll have to experiment. We're gonna do a stick and poke on Connor to see if it works.
Brandon: Are we in prison, Julia? What are we doing?
Julia: We're children who cannot technically get tattoos.
Eric: It's— it is scary that Rowan has tattoos.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: It freaks people out.
Amanda: Where I'm from, 17 was late, get my first tattoo.
Eric: I real— okay, I want to do a cover, but I'm realizing that we don't even have a title for what our comic book is. Is it like— all the ones that come to me immediately make it sound like it's for pop stars, like, "Teen dream." I'm like, "That's not it."
Amanda: Oh, yeah. No, I don’t know.
Julia: Well, like, if this is helpful, for example, the, like, X-Men comic that was explicitly about the students at the Academy was called New X-Men: Academy X.
Amanda: That's like how we have to call the current season of Top Chef, Top Chef: Destination Canada, because Top Chef Canada is Canadian Top Chef.
Julia: It's already a thing.
Amanda: Yeah.
Brandon: Isn't just Join the Party: Water's Edge Academy or something like that? You know?
Eric: Yeah, but where does the X go, Brandon?
Brandon: I think in the fucking trash, Eric, is where it goes.
Julia: Pulled at the top at the end.
Eric: Join the Party: Academy X. Generation Delta.
Julia: Ooh.
Brandon: That's not bad.
Eric: That's not bad.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: It's all about change. So we're still do— we're still talking about delta radiation, that would work.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Julia: Also a big fan of Generation X as a X-Men series as well.
Eric: Yes, I did that from Gen V, which were the— for the boys, which was riffing on Generation X, so I— as much as I do like stealing from other properties. Join the Party: Toy Story 4.
Brandon: Now, I do like that one.
Eric: Pretty good, pretty good. Okay. So—
Julia: Pretty good.
Eric: —I'm thinking Join the Party Delta Academy.
Julia: I like that, actually.
Eric: This is issue three, Join the Party: Delta Academy, and I think that this is the front page of the website that teachers use to update assignments.
Julia: Okay.
Amanda: Hmm.
Eric: It's called fight space.
Brandon: Now, why is it called fight space?
Eric: The one I use, which is some ed tech nonsense, is called bright space and it rhymes, Brandon.
Julia: Ah.
Eric: It is so, like, 2002, the most basic website, but of course, it costs, like, $3 billion to make and give to schools. So— and it's very, like, message boardy, lots of pop-ups. The Water's Edge Academy's colors in my head was like, dark blue, blue, blue, light blue, and then accents of brilliant neon green.
Julia: Hell yeah.
Eric: So I think there's that color scheme everywhere with all the different pop-ups for that. And everyone is just asking the most inane teenager questions, be like—
Eric (as senior student): "What was the assignment again? How much does it count? Can I do it with my friends? Can I submit it late? I fell asleep."
Eric: And of course, the big assignment from Dr. Moonboot, username Dr. Moonboot is Interview with a Villain, issue one.
Amanda: Hmm.
Julia: Cool.
Brandon: Hell yeah.
Eric: And the first page is a student in the senior seminar, saying—
Eric (as senior student): "What was the assignment again?"
Eric: And Dr. Mo is still standing in front of the projector from the previous episode that says, "INTERVIEW WITH A VILLAIN," in big letters, and he's just pointing to it, he's like—
Eric (as Dr. Ram): This, we're still talking about this.
Eric (as senior student): "Wait, does the multiverse exist?"
Eric (as Dr. Ram): We're not talking about that anymore. I'm assigning your project for the beginning of the semester. So here is the assignment that I need you to turn in, in two weeks. We're going to be working on it together in class, so don't feel like you need to push yourself and get something immediate. We're going to work it out. I need you in your clubs or in any group that you want to assemble in. I need you to interview a villain. I need you to get some sort of recorded documents, whether it's write— whether it's written, whether it's video, whether it's audio. I need you to ask some questions of a villain and put yourself in the situation where you can actually talk to them. I know plenty of you have had your training and your scrapes and your scrimmages here at the academy, but you got to get out there and interact with some of the bad guys that are out there in the environment. Now before— hey, before you raise your hand and you're gonna say something like, "Oh, where are the villains? There's no villains here in Jupiter. Why would they do that?" There's definitely— there are definitely villains out there. You gotta open your mind up. You gotta open your eyes up and look for them. That's why part of this project involves reconnaissance. I need every single person in your groups of three to give me some sort of document in order for you to get full credit. I know you're doing this in a team, but each of you needs to bring something unique here to this project here.
Amanda: Rowan, from between Connor and Craft, just puts both fists slightly to the side, and they all fist bump.
Julia: Yeah. Just giant fists from both of them—
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: —to Rowan's tiny, tiny, little fists.
Brandon: Accidentally crushes Rowan.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Ah, yes.
Eric: Dr. Mo picks up a sheaf of papers and flips through it. And then you see there's a panel of Connor raising his hand. There's a photo roster that Dr. Mo is using for attendance and just the most freshman year Connor photo of— you're wearing a tie, and you can see all of your teeth smiling as big as possible.
Brandon: Can you see his teeth? Who can say? Maybe a couple of them. But what you can see is a giant mop of, like, emo hair from middle school.
Eric: Oh, hell yeah. Okay, great.
Julia: Aw, cute.
Eric: So good.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Yes, Connor.
Brandon (as Connor): This sounds really dangerous. Is there any sort of insurance situation? Do we bring weapons? What happens if we get attacked?
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah, if we defeat them, is that full credit?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): You guys are seniors. I— you're going to be— most of you are going to be professional heroes next year. I thought that that was kind of a given. If they're doing something bad, yeah, stop them. You're— you need to figure out how to deal with this for yourself. I know we haven't had— we— I know you— some of you have had internships. Some of you haven't. Some of you've done some summer jobs. This is a chance for all of you to get out there and, you know, get in the mix, which you're going to have to do.
Julia (as Craft): Also, like, most villains really suck, so I know we're like, you know, trying to be cautious and everything, but a lot of them are just bad at their jobs.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): So it should be easy. Does anyone have another question before I answer— as for Connor? Okay, Connor, yes.
Julia: Silence from the classroom.
Brandon: Julia, give me a small cough so I could insert in there.
Julia: [coughs]
Amanda: Practical sound effects only.
Brandon (as Connor): Uh, okay, that makes sense, and I— I'm now remembering that we did sign that huge liability waiver freshman year where we can't sue the school for anything that happens to us.
Amanda (as Rowan): Ever.
Brandon (as Connor): Ever. In any circumstance, whatsoever. Even if we die and then come back to life and then want to sue.
Amanda (as Rowan): Especially then.
Brandon (as Connor): But do— for the report, do we just need to turn in the transcripts of the interview, or is there some sort of report situation? Like, what do you kind of want for the turn in-able?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Another thing about being a professional hero is about quality controlling your own work, so it's up to you to determine what is good enough for you to turn in. I know that you have a lot of rubrics in your other classes, but I'm off of this one. You need to be able to figure out what is good enough for you, and then I will determine if it's actually good enough, like, objectively.
Amanda: Rowan breaks her pen in half, and then immediately has to, like, compress the ink into a cube to stop it from going everywhere.
Amanda (as Rowan): This is my worst nightmare.
Eric (as Wraith): I have a question.
Eric: Behind you, there is a cloaked figure just in robes and robes of black. You cannot see through the robes. There's like a terrible, dark aura coming off of this student behind you.
Brandon: It's my true form.
Julia: Do we recognize this person?
Eric: And then you see a high school girl's face just pop out of the—
Brandon: Oh, it's no longer my true form?
Eric: Just popped out of the robes, be like—
Eric (as Wraith): So can you give us any guidance, though? I just want to make sure that I do a good job.
Eric: This is Wraith, who is a classmate of yours, who you recognize.
Brandon: Hell yeah.
Amanda: New classmate alert.
Julia: Craft's face is like—
Julia (as Craft): Yeah, Wraith is cool. Looking good as always.
Eric (as Wraith): Hey, you know, I haven't gotten— I didn't get a chance to see you before. Y'all were cleaning up, so good to see you, Craft. What up?
Amanda (as Rowan): Hey, what's up, Wraith?
Julia (as Craft): What up?
Eric (as Wraith): Oh, I mean, no. Oh, no. This is only information for my team. My team is gonna do the best. Our grades are gonna be so good. Gerrrr.
Eric: Shakes off a cloak— horrible fist at you from under the black cloak.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, yeah, shaken at the competition, you know?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): The main thing is that each one of you needs to have some sort of thing to show me. Each of you needs to have some sort of unique piece here. It doesn't really matter how you do it. You just need to have something. Like all of you in your group of three can pursue the same villain, but you each need to have something individual for me to grade.
Amanda (as Rowan): Like a sit rep report, you know?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Again, I think you— you're all overthinking this a little bit. I know that, seniors, you're getting worried about rankings, you're getting worried about next year. You can just do it. Like, I need you to believe me, you can do this. Don't overthink it.
Brandon (as Connor): I just want to put out there— I don't think the— like if we went into corporate heroing—
Amanda (as Rowan): Uh-hmm.
Brandon (as Connor): —my boss is going to have a way out. They want me to put the report together, you know?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): And if you have ways that you think would be good. You can't just ask the boss things. The boss is gonna be like, "Hey, you should bring me good stuff," and you're gonna— and if you spend all this time asking, well, how good stuff goes, then they're gonna be like, "Hey, I can find someone to do it faster and better." And then you're gonna be out of a job. Do you want to be out of a job? I've seen it go like that. If you find a faster, younger, smarter, fast superhero, and then, boom, they're out.
Amanda (as Rowan): Is that why you're a teacher now?
Eric: There's just, like, flashback panels of just flaming rubble behind Moonboot, who has, like, you know, vague NASA-like costume, just all white, lots of silver, like silver epaulettes and, like, silver accoutrement all over with, like, big—
Julia: Like 1960s space man vibes.
Eric: Very much so. And then you just see both of his ankles going the wrong way.
Amanda: Ugh.
Eric: In a horrible shadow, with a shadow of, like, indeterminate inhuman shape looming over him.
Julia: Ooh, I don't like that.
Eric: And then Dr. Mo says—
Eric (as Dr. Ram): No, I got a scholarship to study. That's why I do it.
Amanda (as Rowan): Right on.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): But that's funny. It's funny you said that.
Amanda (as Rowan): Right on.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Good job. Good job, Rowan. Thank you. I won't remember that when I'm grading your project. I'm kidding, but think about it, because those are the things that will— that people will remember when you're a pro. Anyone else? Does anyone have any questions? I can get— or we could talk about this all day or I could tell you maybe the— or I can go over the backbone of apprehension as opposed to annihilation?
Julia (as Craft): Just, like, real quick, you're not, like, gonna assign us a villain. You're gonna just let us pick our own, yeah?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Yes, you should pick your own.
Julia (as Craft): Sick.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): That's part of the project here. I mean, the only thing that the school reminds me of is that students who are in teams, you should do it in your teams. But anyone else, I mean, you probably already assemble your own teams, you could just do it together if you'd like to. Okay?
Brandon (as Connor): But everyone has to have their own report, right?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): You should have— you should be bringing something new in your specific report, maybe like a unique question, a unique material, something you can do— something that you can do here.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah, like, Gravitas looked incredible when she was taking down that, like, super thing that happened across the fight from my perspective as the other person in the fight.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Sure, yeah, you could do— yeah, sure. Okay.
Amanda (as Rowan): Like, same fight, different perspective. You know what I mean.
Eric (as TeamCast): Player one, start.
Eric: Sitting next to Wraith, there is a TV that is on top of a video game console and a large, purple, translucent body with just, like, wires and technological pieces inside.
Eric (as TeamCast): Player one has a question.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Sure, hold on.
Eric: Picks up the roster again, says—
Eric (as Dr. Ram): TeamCast, you got a question?
Eric (as TeamCast): I do.
Brandon: Like Dreamcast, but Team—
Julia: Incredible.
Eric: Like Team, but Dreamcast, yes, exactly.
Amanda: Next levels of Eric Silver NPC invention.
Eric (as TeamCast): Does it matter who has the highest score out of the teams?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): That's up for you to decide. I can't—
Eric (as TeamCast): I'm gonna do combo bonuses. Isn't that right, Wraith?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Absolutely, TC, you're gonna get those combos.
Eric (as TeamCast): I'm gonna go pew, boom, headshot, boom, Kilimanjaro.
Eric: Wraith retreats her face back into her cloak.
Eric (as Wraith): Well, that's not what we're trying to do here. We're not trying to have their souls get out of their bodies.
Eric (as TeamCast): I would get the highest score.
Eric (as Wraith): Okay. That’s fine.
Brandon (as Connor): It's the quality or like, like lethalness of the bad guy, a part of the grade? Like the worst the villain, the better the grade or—
Eric (as Dr. Ram): What do you think the answer to this is, Connor?
Brandon (as Connor): I think probably if one of our team dies, we get bonus points.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): No, don't— no, that's— I didn't say that. That's not— don't do that.
Julia: Craft praises her.
Julia (as Craft): I volunteer.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): No, don't.
Julia (as Craft): I'll be beheaded. Is that, like, bonus points or whatever?
Brandon (as Connor): There's— the school necromancer is still on call, right? I mean—
Amanda (as Rowan): I did hear that if your teammate dies, you get free tuition.
Brandon (as Connor): That's what I've heard, yeah.
Julia (as Craft): Are we paying tuition?
Eric (as Dr. Ram): That's not true. I can't— I cannot allow someone to say that out loud and not say something as an employee.
Julia (as Craft): Are you guys paying to be here? You shouldn't be.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): I—
Julia (as Craft): It's a bad idea.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Yes, I'm an employee.
Julia (as Craft): No, I mean, like, I— I'm asking my fellow— sir, I'm asking my fellow students.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Oh, my God.
Julia (as Craft): If they paid to be here.
Amanda (as Rowan): Room and board, I guess.
Julia (as Craft): That's wild.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): I'm rusty dealing with seniors. I—
Amanda (as Rowan): Hey, Dr. Mo, you're doing great.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Thank you. All right.
Julia: Craft is like—
Julia (as Craft): I feel ambivalent about how he's doing, to be honest.
Brandon: I have to say, because I'm not doing it well, but I am trying my damnedest to not be actual Brandon and just destroy this teacher out of chaos.
Julia: Remember, you're a nerd. You're a nerd.
Brandon: I know. I'm a character who cares.
Amanda: These NPCs are awesome.
Brandon: Yeah, they're really cool.
Eric: From outside of the classroom, you hear the clip clop of a horse running as fast as it can, coming closer and closer to you. And then the galloping stops and the door opens, and a regular-looking high school boy says—
Eric (as Rick): Oh, sorry, I'm late. I was getting water. My bad.
Brandon (as Connor): Getting water? What?
Eric (as Rick): I was drinking at the fountain and then I saw that the fountain was dirty, so I was cleaning it. And then I got distracted, and now I'm here. Hello, sorry, I'm la— sorry, I'm late. Hey, Powers, nice to meet you.
Eric: As he reaches his hand out, his hands turn into a big octopus tentacle and just extends all the way down from the top of the lecture hall and reaches out to Dr Mo. and Dr. Mo begrudgingly takes it, shakes the octopus hand, and Powers retreats it with a pop of the suction cups. All of you definitely knows who you— who this is because he comes in dramatically late, just so everyone can know. That's Rick Powers, Number One Rank at Water's Edge Academy here as the seniors.
Brandon (as Connor): How could he be number one if he's late all the time?
Amanda: What does Rick look like?
Eric: Rick? When you boot up any RPG, it starts with this setting.
Julia: Fair. Fair enough.
Eric: Brown hair— white guy, brown hair, brown eyes, average build, average height. He's wearing a black and white baseball three-quarters shirt.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Eric: Blue jeans, black Converse, and is very calm. He walks into situations and it's all good. I think that's probably because his powers take care of most of the work. His power is adaptive superpowers. Whenever he's in a problem, whenever he's in a conflict, his powers, his body just kind of takes over and makes one of his appendages into something that's helpful, maybe his eyes then start to shoot some sort of beam out of them. He'll have some sort of breath. And the reason why he's number one is because his powers take care of the heavy lifting. So he spends all of his time actually thinking through how to cause as little damage as possible. That's why he's ranked number one.
Brandon: Oh.
Julia: Is his super name just Powers?
Eric: He's Rick. Everyone knows him as Rick.
Julia: Okay.
Eric: His real name is Rick Powers, and people just know him as Powers.
Julia: Gotcha.
Amanda: Nice.
Brandon So is his power like— it's not like he's, like, copying nearby supers powers. It's like— there's almost like a intuitive or like mutualistic thing within him that determines what he needs at the time, without him having to think about it?
Eric: Absolutely. Yeah, it is intuitive.
Brandon: Cool.
Eric: It is intuitive and adaptive that is separate from his thinking mind.
Brandon: Cool.
Amanda: Hmm.
Eric: So it's almost like— sometimes there's like a venom situation where he is doing one thing while his powers are doing another thing. But the potentiality of having a— having such a thinking person next to you, such powerful and quick acting powers, is what makes him so attractive to the algorithm.
Brandon Gotta say that must have sucked during puberty.
Julia: I was gonna say there's an X-Men character named Lifeguard whose power is—
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: —literally, like, whatever ability she needs in order to, like, get out of a life- threatening situation, she develops.
Eric: Hmm.
Brandon: That's cool.
Eric: Yeah. There's another one that Julia suggested before who— called Darwin.
Julia: Yes.
Eric: But Darwin is so traumatized.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: They're like— they— totally different direction here. They have this almost like symbiotic relationship between Rick the person, and Powers the powers.
Julia: Uh-hmm.
Brandon: I love that.
Eric (as Rick): Oh, TeamCast, thanks for saving me a seat. How did you know I was gonna be late?
Eric (as TeamCast): You are always late. I anticipated it and did a countermove.
Julia: It's so funny, because Craft loves Wraith and then cannot stand the other two members of this team.
Eric: And Powers sits directly in between Wraith and TeamCast.
Amanda: I see our rivals have arrived.
Eric: What do you talk— what? What do you mean?
Brandon: Mr. Boot and Rick Powers.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): All right. So, you know, Rick, just look it up online, or have one of your teammates help you. I gotta move on. We have a lot to cover and I feel like we've spent 30— we've already spent 30 minutes talking about the assignment, and what was the other thing that we talked about? About multiverses?
Amanda (as Rowan): There's never a multiverse.
Julia (as Craft): Doesn't exist.
Eric (as Rick): They don't exist.
Brandon (as Connor): Don't exist.
Eric (as Dr. Ram): Exactly. We have a lot more to cover, and we only have 30— we already have 39 more minutes to cover it in.
Eric: Hey, you want to do some cool start-up session stuff here? Hello, hi, it's Eric, the DM.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: Yay.
Eric: I'm no longer your teacher. I'm your teacher, the different kind.
Amanda: Wow.
Julia: Ah.
Amanda: Hi, Eric.
Brandon: Can I give you a good rating on Rate My Professor real quick?
Eric: Yeah, please.
Brandon: Oh, we should start Rate My DM.
Amanda: Oh, that's a great idea.
Brandon: No, it's not. Don't do that to your DM.
Eric: Oh, yeah, let's do that. That sounds great. I definitely want that.
Brandon: Don't do that to your DM, people.
Eric: Cool.
Brandon: Unless— well— okay, here, let me pitch you my idea, Eric. It's Rate My DM, but the only rating you can give is five, out of five.
Eric: Yes, Brandon. Great.
Amanda: Because— and then when you hover over an explanation, it's because they did the work.
Brandon: Yeah.
Eric: Because they prepared a game for me and I— and it kept me entertained for a few hours, didn't it?
Brandon: So it's just name of DM, rating five out of five, and then add a tip, and it's only 25%.
Amanda: Great. Brandon, that's your best idea yet.
Julia: Yep.
Eric: Brandon, I love it. I love it.
Julia: I agree, Brandon.
Eric: So, yeah, I want to start with some start-up session moves—
Brandon: Woo!
Eric: —that we usually do here at the old Masks farm. So since we're starting, I'm going to add one team to the pool. I'm going to let it ride after the introductory arc, so you have five in the team pool.
Brandon: Hell yeah.
Julia: All right.
Amanda: Wow.
Julia: Five in the team pool.
Eric: Up to five. I'm also going to introduce a specific thing that the Masks supplement, the school supplement that we're working off of, that they invented that I think is incredibly interesting. Because I have introduced a large project to you, I can introduce the academic move.
Julia: Oh.
Brandon: Oh.
Eric: At the start of the session, if the time comes to prove your worthiness, the GM tells you what test looms on the horizon. The GM chooses one label that reflects a test or project assigned by the faculty to the students on the team. And then I get to pick which label I'm going to do here. I think this is danger. I think this is danger.
Julia: Okay.
Eric: Danger tests include how to handle threats and proper control of powers. That makes sense to me.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: Uh-hmm.
Eric: So when I call for this project to be resolved at the end of the session, which we kind of talked about at the end of the run, when it feels good, I'm going to have you roll plus the label I've then chosen, which is danger.
Amanda: Cool.
Eric: You can still use team points accordingly, to talk about how you are helping each other. And on a hit, you pass with flying colors, and you get one potential or you get to shift your labels. But if you get a seven to nine or a failure, you're going to have to sacrifice something from your personal life because you didn't do that well on your project.
Julia: Oh.
Amanda: I'm stoked This is such a cool mechanic.
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: Like my favorite T-shirt.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: On a seven to nine, you did all right, but you have to sacrifice something. You disappoint an adult, you sacrifice your social life, you lose a responsibility, or you hurt your academic standing.
Brandon: Yikes.
Eric: Which is explicitly going to be your ranking here. On a miss, you blew it hard, and the faculty—
Julia: Oh, no.
Eric: —and people who care about you will come down on you, prepare yourself. That is explicitly language from the book.
Julia: Well, I don't like that.
Brandon: I don't like that, either.
Amanda: He winks.
Eric: So remember, this task will involve danger.
Brandon: Danger.
Eric: Okay?
Amanda: Cool.
Eric: At some point, I will ask you to roll danger to fulfill this academic project.
Brandon: Hell yeah.
Eric: Okay?
Amanda: Luckily, I've got plus three to that right now.
Brandon: Yeah, I got plus two. What do you have, Julia?
Julia: Oh. Plus one. We're like a little cascade.
Amanda: Well, see, labels can shift all the time, baby.
Julia: That's true.
Eric: I hope whoever's writing this comic book doesn't set up situations where that's gonna be an issue for you.
Julia: I'm sure it'll all be fine.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: And nothing bad will happen.
Eric: Sta--
Brandon: Are you--
Eric: I was just gonna star wipe, Brandon.
Brandon: You can star wipe.
Eric: What do you have? What do you do?
Julia: Star wipe away, sir.
Brandon: I was just gonna ask if you are also the anchor.
Eric: No, I think that's you, buddy. I think that's you.
Brandon: It wasn't funny.
Eric: I think you do the lettering.
Brandon: Let's star wipe, okay?
Amanda: Brandon, that was really good. That was good for the comic book heads.
Eric: That was good. Star wipe, class is over and everyone is pouring out of the lecture hall.
Brandon: Connor turns to Rowan and says—
Brandon (as Connor): Look, I don't want to say that I'm panicking, because it's never useful to panic in any situation. But I'm slightly panicked.
Amanda (as Rowan): I can see a pulse.
Brandon (as Connor): And—
Amanda (as Rowan): I can always see your pulse.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah. I don't know if— you can see my sleeve right here is kind of jumping out of my arm.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, that's because I'm panicking.
Amanda (as Rowan): On account of the transparent vein underneath that I can see the pulse is jumping.
Brandon (as Connor): Uh-huh. Yeah.
Eric: There's literally, like, vibration lines coming off of it.
Amanda (as Rowan): You need me to compress your heart a little bit?
Brandon (as Connor): If you could.
Amanda: And Rowan does what she calls the gravity blanket.
Brandon: Aw.
Amanda: Which is to give Connor a big hug, covering as much surface area as possible, like one leg picked up a little bit to, like, circle around his calf, and at the same time, she is compressing him very slightly. Yes, they tested this on water balloons, give him the effect of a gravity blanket. Just briefly.
Brandon: I love that.
Julia (as Craft): Connor, you could always just like, you know, step outside with me too, if you want to calm down a little.
Brandon: Connor looks at the Twinkies, looks at Craft, looks at the box of Twinkies, looks at Craft, and says—
Brandon (as Connor): I think I got all the juice I need right here, Craft. Thank you.
Julia (as Craft): Hell yeah, dawg.
Eric: [buzzes] Your phone's going off, Craft.
Julia: Craft pulls it out of her pocket.
Eric: Just a flurry of text messages from Emily Slaughter with screenshots of the corporate credit card account.
Julia (as Craft): No.
Eric: Being like—
Eric (as Emily Slaughter): I certainly didn't go to Costco yesterday. Who went to Costco? Who has access to this
Julia: Swipe down. put on Do Not Disturb, and puts back in the pocket.
Eric (as Emily Slaughte): We are going to talk.
Amanda (as Rowan): It's gonna be fine. Craft, maybe let's default to you, any villains that you want to talk to?
Julia (as Craft): That I personally— I have more of a list of ones I wouldn't want to talk to.
Amanda (as Rowan): Right.
Brandon (as Connor): My aunts can probably give us the hookup, I think. She works at Heroes 4 Hire, so I'm sure we can get, like a— I'm sure she has some hookup somewhere. I don't know. I can't guarantee it, but maybe, you know?
Amanda (as Rowan): I feel like it'd be cool to find a villain in the wild and not like a reformed one that already, like, works here, whatever.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, like a Pokemon.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah, like the easy answer. And you know me, I love the easy answer, would be misappropriation.
Amanda (as Rowan): True.
Brandon (as Connor): Right, right.
Julia (as Craft): Because she's just, like, here.
Brandon (as Connor): Should we— are you saying, Rowan, that you want to set a honey pot?
Amanda (as Rowan): What? No. I want to, like, go into Lake Town City and, like, walk around.
Julia (as Craft): Connor, don't be gross.
Amanda (as Rowan): And be like, "Oh, maybe, like, there's a villain here."
Brandon (as Connor):Okay, I'm gonna have to teach you guys what honey pot is later. Okay. Do you want to start a trap for a villain?
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Eric: I think you're still just standing outside the classroom, and there— you hear a rustling right in front of you, and there's an incredibly large cardboard box that is, like, shuddering and--
Julia: Oh, word?
Eric: —moving.
Julia: Uh-huh.
Eric: Then two big atomic purple feet come out from the bottom of them and then settled down.
Julia: Craft just picks the box up and says—
Julia (as Craft): What up, TC?
Eric: A big exclamation point appears over TeamCast's head and be like—
Eric (as TeamCast): Um, uh, my stealth!
Julia (as Craft): Yeah, you gotta pay more attention in that class, I think, because moving cardboard box tends to bring more attention than just, like, not.
Eric (as Wraith): What if it was a diversion?
Eric: This big swoop of just darkest night envelops all of you, and she's like—
Eric (as Wraith): Haha, I just got you.
Amanda: Rowan drops to the ground.
Julia (as Craft): Fucking got me. I love it.
Eric (as Rick): Yeah.
Eric (as Wraith): You're so easy. It's so easy to take care of—
Julia: Yeah.
Eric (as Wraith): And maybe I could eat your soul while I'm doing it.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, you got us.
Julia (as Craft): I don't know if I have one of those, so like, go nuts.
Eric (as Rick): Wraith, TC, come on. Let's leave everyone's favorite plucky, fun-loving Ram drop scallions alone. We got stuff to do. We don't have to bother them while they're planning the villain they're getting.
Amanda (as Rowan): Oh, Rick, you— you're worried I'm coming for your spot, huh?
Eric (as Rick): No.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, oh, guys, we could get Rick. Get it?
Amanda (as Rowan): Oh, that's true.
Brandon (as Connor): Because he's a fucking villain. Got 'em.
Eric (as Rick): Hey, Connor, nice.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah.
Eric (as Rick): Cool.
Brandon (as Connor): Nice.
Amanda (as Rowan): Great. How was your summer? I like you.
Eric (as Rick): Oh, good. I mean, I had to— I kind of did, like, a Persephone situation.
Julia (as Craft): Sick.
Amanda (as Rowan): You went somewhere else for six months?
Eric (as Rick): I was— for half the summer, I was in hell, but the other half, I was on the beach.
Amanda (as Rowan): Oh, nice. Did you get to eat fruit?
Brandon (as Connor): Metaphorically or—
Eric (as Rick): No, really. No, I got an internship with Mephisto. It was good.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh.
Eric (as Rick): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): Cool.
Brandon (as Connor): But did you eat fruit?
Eric (as Rick): Yeah, it was— I mean, better up here, for sure.
Amanda (as Rowan): Ah.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah.
Eric (as Rick): The sun, the sun's helpful.
Julia (as Craft): The sun, yeah.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah. Word.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah.
Eric (as Rick): Yeah.
Amanda (as Rowan): Cool.
Eric (as Rick): Go— yeah, hey, How's your summer? What was going on?
Amanda (as Rowan): Mostly here.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, yeah, you know, just chilling—
Brandon (as Connor): Studying mostly.
Julia (as Craft): —vibes.
Brandon (as Connor): You know, reading up on the latest techniques.
Amanda (as Rowan): Getting into Aramaic.
Brandon (as Connor): And stuff. Ooh, Aramaic. I didn't know you did that. That's cool.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Eric (as Wraith): Love a dead language.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah, Wraith, I bet you got something to teach me, too.
Eric (as Wraith): Yeah, absolutely. Oh, sorry, you know, hey, actually, I should tell you, I got a key. I just stay in this form for more often, is— the only way I'm gonna get my ranking up is if the, you know, the— if the rankers see me, then I can hold this for as long as possible. So it's gonna be a lot of this.
Julia (as Craft): Cool. No, I like both.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): So, you know, you do you, right?
Amanda (as Rowan): Good hang in both forms. Uh-hmm.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah.
Eric (as Rick): Cool.
Brandon (as Connor): Your breath is so cold that it like— is really refreshing, honestly.
Amanda (as Rowan): Oh, nice.
Julia (as Craft): But it smells like brimstone, so it's an interesting combo.
Brandon (as Connor): Well—
Amanda (as Rowan): Not bad.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah.
Eric: Wraith floats up to both Connor and Craft, be like—
Eric (as Wraith): How does it feel this close?
Julia (as Craft): Honestly, pretty intimidating. Like, if I was a villain, hell yeah, would be very scared.
Eric (as Wraith): I'll see you later. You know, if you're around the dorms where there's gonna be like a— we're having, like, a homecoming senior thing.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, sick as fuck.
Brandon (as Connor): Again, you know, we say this to you a lot, but if you ever want to join our team as an alternate, we're always looking for the alternate, so—
Amanda (as Rowan): Uh-hmm.
Brandon (as Connor): —you know, you don't have to stay with these colleagues here.
Eric (as Rick): Oh, and you could always join the team holding my dick. Got 'em!
Eric: All right.
Julia: Was that Rick Powers that said that?
Eric: Yeah, that was Rick.
Julia: Jesus Christ.
Eric: Yeah, it was Rick Powers.
Amanda: Oh, my God, Rick.
Eric (as Rick): Hey, Connor, you're— the spot's open. You can definitely just, like, hold it for me. That would be sick.
Brandon (as Connor): Is that one of your powers? It's like, hold your dick?
Eric (as Rick): No, I— that's not one of my powers. I need someone to do it.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, so it's just like a fun thing you do over time to waste your own time, is hold your dick and—
Eric (as Rick): No, if someone else did it— but if someone else did it for me, it would be really helpful for me, specifically.
Amanda (as Rowan): Why, in like romance? What's wrong with that?
Julia (as Craft): Oh, sorry, Rick, you can't— your powers can't handle that for you. I thought they do everything for you.
Eric (as Rick): You guys are so funny. I love how you twist my words around, so I get confused.
Brandon (as Connor): Do you think when Rick tries to go hold his own dick, it like shrinks, because that's the power? The power is like, "No, no, no. You can't do this. It's not good."
Julia (as Craft): Yeah, strong. Well, I was gonna say you're not strong enough.
Brandon (as Connor): You're not strong enough.
Julia (as Craft): That's saying his dick is big, so—
Amanda (as Rowan): Okay. What's the problem? What's the problem?
Brandon (as Connor): Rick's dick is small, is the problem.
Amanda (as Rowan): Oh. All right.
Eric (as TeamCast): Let's leave.
Eric: TeamCast has gotten back in the cardboard box and is now stealthily trying to walk away from this conversation.
Julia (as Craft): Buddy, you gotta pay more attention in stealth class.
Eric (as TeamCast): You can't see me. I'm a box.
Amanda (as Rowan): That's freshman behavior TC.
Julia (as Craft): Okay.
Eric (as TeamCast): Why don't you hold my dick? Got 'em.
Brandon Outside of the box, you see the end of the— like, the wire from a controller flop out.
Eric: It'd be like, "Oh." And then cranks it back.
Amanda: Rowan is like—
Amanda (as Rowan): Why does it hurt while coming from a machine? Oh, my God.
Julia (as Craft): Because someone had to build it for him.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): That's the fucked up part.
Eric (as Wraith): See you later, guys.
Julia (as Craft): Love you, Wraith.
Brandon (as Connor): Love you, Wraith.
Amanda (as Rowan): If we come, it'll be for you.
Eric: A skeleton hand reaches out and gives you a peace sign.
Julia (as Craft): Deuces.
Eric: Y'all want to work on your project? What do you want to do?
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: We do, Eric.
Julia: Do we have any other classes today or is just like, "All right, go nuts, kiddos."?
Eric: We can do a montage of other classes.
Brandon: Oh, okay.
Eric: Craft, you're in Calculus. How's that going?
Julia (as Craft): Bad.
Brandon: Well, is there a level of high where the numbers start to make sense to you?
Julia: Yeah, but it's a real small window. They're too much or too little, and there's no in between.
Eric: Connor, you're in Hero Nutrition, and you're not allowed to touch any of the food. How's that going?
Brandon: Rude. I mean, my hands are clean. You just can't see them.
Eric: It's like, "Here, take the gloves, put on the gloves."
Brandon: Okay, yeah. And Connor puts on the gloves, and now you see two floating Mickey Mouse hands. Ya-ta, ta-ta, ta-ra, ta-ta-ta.
Eric: Rowan, you're in AP Euro. How's that going?
Amanda: It's mostly a history of anti-semitism, so Rowan already knows a lot, and it's, you know, a little bit heavy on the soul, but she's learning some, like, warfare techniques. I'd say.
Brandon: That's good.
Julia: Cool.
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: In my head, I would— you said that and I saw Rowan just, like, do a kick flip, like Tony Hawk pro skater, and made, like, the kickflip sound like, "Berrrr."
[theme]
Amanda: Hey, hey, it's Amanda. Don't worry. You have me back today. Sunchoke is going to leave you alone. Hey, if you didn't hear what Eric said in the recap, one, listen to the recaps. They're great. And two, Julia and Eric are keeping an amazing list of NPCs that we meet throughout this campaign. Click on the link in the episode description. You can also get there on jointhepartypod.com by clicking Superhero School and that has names, pronouns, powers, descriptions, and where we first meet characters. It's all on our website, updated every Tuesday. Okay? Click that link in the episode description. And hey, did you hear that we have a Lake Town City One Shot on vinyl? That's right, we produced brilliant Chad Green vinyl. It's an exclusive episode. You can only hear it on the vinyl, but every purchase comes with an mp3 so you don't have to buy a record player unless you want to, in which case you should. It is an incredible One Shot. The vinyl is so beautiful. I'm going to be framing it and putting it on my wall, because, y'all, we absolutely killed it, if I do say so myself. The insert in the vinyl is gorgeous and has little January's hopping around. The actual cover art depicts our superhero heroes on the set of The Newlywed Game with their clones. I mean, what else could you want? And then, honestly, you might want to buy two, because the back has these portraits of our heroes from Campaign Two. Oh, it's so beautiful. We only made a 100. We are never going to make any more, so you have to go now to jointhepartypod.com/merch to pick it up. That's jointhepartypod.com/merch. Thank you so much to our newest patrons, Phoenix and Iron Wolf. You've helped us get two people closer to our goal of 50 new paid patrons. If we hit that, we need 23 more, we are going to play another One Shot from the character creation episodes that we played out in the One Shot Derby. And remember, only paying patrons can hear that One Shot. It'll be coming to you very soon at patreon.com/jointhepartypod. If you like Join the Party, I promise you are going to love the other shows that are part of the Multitude Podcast collective. You can dive into genes, microbes, and other tiny things that have a big impact on our world with Tiny Matters. And what exactly do I mean by that? So scientists Sam Jones and Deboki Chakravarti take apart complex and contentious topics in science to rebuild your understanding. The last couple episodes of Tiny Matters have been on topics like rape kits and race science, the ways that racist, scientific education and research from the past still impact people today. It is so, so worth your time. They are incredible hosts, and I promise you are going to learn something, whether that is the modern politics and science of rape kits or ancient deadly diseases and sewers and stuff like that. You are gonna love Sam and Deboki. Check out Tiny Matters today wherever you get your podcasts. And finally, we are sponsored this week by Mage Hand Press, where Valda's Spire of Secrets player pack is now live on D&D Beyond. Our friends at Mage Hand Press, including Mage Hand Mike, shout out, have taken their biggest and most ambitious book to date in Valda's Spire of Secrets, and boiled it down to the best handful of options for 5e. So if you are a user of D&D Beyond, go check out the Valda's Spire of Secrets player pack. And if you're not and you just want to read some incredible world-building from some incredible people, go to magehandpress.com. You can see everything that Mage Hand makes, and take advantage of the 10% off sale they're doing throughout April. They also have a giveaway. It's incredible. You are going to want to support them. They are good people, and they make good classes, good items, good stuff. That's magehandpress.com.
Tom: Hey, do you like role-playing games? Well, you should check out Mystery Quest. It's an actual play podcast where we focus on all kinds of indie TTRPGs with a rolling cast of special guests. You can find us anywhere where you get your podcasts. I'll see you there.
Amanda: And now, back to the show.
[theme]
Eric: Let's speed up. How are y'all gonna tackle this project?
Brandon: Hmm.
Julia: I think during Calculus, because Craft was not getting it. She probably made a list of all of the villains who she does not want to interview as options.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Eric: Hmm.
Julia: And it's like three pages long. She's like—
Julia (as Craft): No, that guy used to come to the Christmas parties and he just sucked.
Amanda: Uh-hmm. I think Rowan is going to look into, like ,news bulletins and look into newspapers and local reporting and see if there any active APBs out for villains or any, like, warnings in the superhero community about, like, new villains popping up, new folks to reach out for.
Brandon: I think Connor, on the way to the meetup, when they're gonna talk about this, is gonna call his aunt and just ask her, like, "Are there any villains that are the perfect Goldilocks zone of, like, power level, not too big, not too smart, could be captured in a basket of some kind, but also is, like, good enough to get me an A?" You know?
Julia: Are there very memeable villains out there right now that is, like— people don't take them too seriously, but also they're, like, a well-known name.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: I think that would be the perfect medium for us.
Brandon: Yeah. Like someone who's really— got good publicity, but, like, isn't really doing that much damage, you know?
Eric: Memeable villains is so funny.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: Sure. Okay. So here's where I'm gonna— here's we're gonna do. Let's do assess the situation. I'm gonna do the— let's do this for Rowan, and I think that Connor, because you have a connect, you'll be able to actually just ask a question.
Brandon: Okay.
Eric: And you'll be able to just talk to your aunt and she might be able to point you in the right direction, while Rowan needs to— if she's doing research, she's gonna be pointed in some different directions here.
Brandon: Cool.
Eric: Rowan, since you're doing research, why don't you do assess the situation? You can ask me some questions here based on the assess the situation list of questions of what direction we can get pointed in. So why don't you roll plus superior? And let's figure it out.
Amanda: Let's do it. All right, that is a seven, and my modifier right now for superior is plus zero.
Julia: Gotcha.
Eric: A seven, so you can just ask one question. What here can I use to do blank? What here is the biggest threat? What here is in the greatest danger? Who here is the most vulnerable to me? How can we best end this quickly? So I think you can kind of mold those to these pre— this project actually pretty nicely.
Amanda: Yeah. So can I say, what villain here is most vulnerable to me?
Eric: Yes. The one that's most vulnerable probably is the one that's been hitting up liquor stores and supermarkets in the area, which is cloud cover. Cloud cover is a series of cousins who all have cloud-themed powers that have been going on a suburban crime spree lately. They are definitely doing this for attention because they only get, like, $75 and some turkey at a time.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Eric: But they certainly keep doing it so people know that it's happening. They're also not, like, hurting anyone. It's more of an annoyance so, like, no one has really stepped in to deal with them right now. Like, they'll probably just like, go off to Lake Town City after— if we don't give them any attention.
Amanda: Rowan, like, jumps up in her seat. She's like—
Amanda (as Rowan): Oh, perfect, yes!
Eric: And yeah, Connor, if— you can definitely call up your Aunt Anita if you want.
Brandon: I would love to do that. Bring, bring.
Julia: It's an old-timey phone.
Eric: Old-timey phone in the sleekest office you've ever seen.
Brandon: It's a— like a red phone, but like, just for Connor. It's like a direct line—
Julia: Aw.
Brandon: —only to Connor, you know?
Eric: Oh, that's good.
Julia: Did she get it for Connor for, like, a birthday or something, or a holiday?
Brandon: Absolutely.
Julia: That's really cute.
Eric: She picks up the phone and she says—
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Sweetie, hold on. I'm in the middle of a meeting. I don't care that you're powered by gold. That doesn't really seem like my issue, neither the budget. Damn. Hey, sweetie, Connor, what's happening? Are you all right? You called the red phone.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, no, it's not a bad— remember, it's not a bad red phone. It's an important red phone. You know?
Eric (as Anita Tigre): I know. And every time you call, it's important, so I want to know what it is. I need you to deliver the important information, which is, how are you doing?
Julia: Oh.
Amanda: That's so sweet.
Julia: I could cry.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, I'm good. I'm good. I—
Eric: I hope her expectations of him doesn't change.
Brandon (as Connor): I was doing really well on Superhero Nutrition today, because I— like, I could smell some things and, like, hear some things that other people can't. So, like, that was good.
Julia: You could smell the level of fiber.
Amanda: You'd hear when you're cutting against the grain.
Brandon (as Connor): My sense of taste is pretty good too, you know? So—
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Oh, right, super taster. That's why we did those classes with the top chefs.
Brandon (as Connor): Exactly, yeah, with the chef tops.
Amanda: Very different.
Julia: Very different.
Brandon (as Connor): But, yeah, sorry, we had another class with this Dr. Moonboot or Mr. Moonboot. I don't know if he's a doctor or not, but he's—
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Oh, yeah, with Dr. Mohinder Ram. He's great.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): I— that's— I— honestly, I've been looking forward to you doing this— I've been looking forward to you taking this class the entire time.
Brandon (as Connor): It seems like a really cool class. I'm excited about it. I don't know that he's necessarily going to be fair and objective, and unbiased in his grading, so I need some help.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Hey, hey.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah?
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Connor, you did the right thing. Here's the thing you need to know. Of course, it's not going to be fair and objective. It's never fair and objective. What you're doing instead is you're fighting with information so that you come out on top.
Brandon (as Connor): Hmm.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): You're doing the right thing. You just can't imagine it's going to be fair. That's what you always need to keep in your head. It's not fair. It's about you being prepared.
Eric: And I want to shift your mundane down and your superior up.
Amanda: Hmm.
Julia: Hmm.
Eric: Even if it's good advice, I'm still shifting your labels, my man.
Amanda: Cool.
Brandon: Okay, great. So I went from mundane is now minus two and superior is now zero.
Amanda: Cool.
Eric: All right.
Brandon (as Connor): Damn, that's really good advice, actually. Which is fair and prepared. So like a fun rhyme with those. Like, fair and prepared. Like, if it's not fair, you must prepare.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Whatever you need to stick it in your head. I'm not a rhyming person. I'm more just, like, stare at it until I fall asleep and then I wake up looking at the same thing again. But whatever works for you—
Brandon (as Connor): Cool.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): —honey.
Brandon (as Connor): Okay, thank you.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): It’s good, it’s alright.
Brandon (as Connor): But anyway, sorry, my assignment is that we need to talk to— we need to interview a super villain and—
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Hmm.
Brandon (as Connor): —we didn't want to just— like, we thought it'd be more fun to catch one in the wild, you know? Like a feral squirrel.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Smart. That was smart. That was definitely smart, for sure.
Brandon (as Connor):Thank you. Yeah, it was not my idea. It was actually Rowan's idea, but I thought it was a good one. So I was calling to see if you had any, like— if you have any leads on indie villains that might be like, you know, not too bright, not too powerful, maybe could fall into a tiger pit full of— without the spikes, but with a net, you know, or whatever.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Well, you know— let me see. Let me— yeah, hold on, hold on, hold on. Click, click, click, click.
Eric: Move around.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): No, that's classified. No, that's super classified. No, that's—
Brandon (as Connor): I'll take super classified.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): No, I can't show you that.
Brandon (as Connor): Damn it.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): It's Galaxy classified, no.
Brandon (as Connor): Galaxy classified? Fuck.
Julia (as Craft): Galaxy classified?
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Let's see. So well, Connor, I understand you're looking for this sweet spot here of not too hard, not too soft, pretty good, might give you something, but you know, the better— I think the recommendation I would give you is that don't waste your time going into Lake Town City. I can't tell you why I know this, but—
Brandon (as Connor): Is it gonna be exploded?
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Lake Town City? No.
Brandon (as Connor): Okay, good.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Well, it might be, but we’ll take care of it.
Brandon (as Connor): Okay.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): There— see, there's plenty of activity in Jupiter itself. You just need to figure out where to look.
Brandon (as Connor): Should I look in the forest or should I look in the city or—
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Any— there's places everywhere, you could just look around.
Brandon (as Connor): Okay.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): You could look around, maybe there's always someone weird or— there's always some weirdos lurking around campus because they hate you, or maybe in the back alleys and the abandoned places in the town, or you know, maybe-- or there's— oh, maybe there's a vulnerable family that's going to be exploited and that could be turned for bad guy gains. It's just all around you.
Brandon (as Connor): Maybe there's an exact address that you were going to say about now.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Yeah, maybe there's an exact address of where this could happen, where someone might show up. It might happen at 1257 Green— Super Green Terrace Boulevard.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh.
Julia: Super Green Terrace Boulevard?
Brandon (as Connor): Super Green Terrace Boulevard.
Eric: There was a lot of expansion going around town.
Amanda: Yeah, yeah.
Eric: When you let the developers name it, they'll say whatever. You know what I mean?
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): And maybe, if someone's vulnerable, maybe there's something there.
Brandon (as Connor): Okay. That's really helpful. I mean, not helpful at all. Make sure to blow up your phone after we talk.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): You're gonna blow up your phone after we talk, right? Because this is my— this is the special phone.
Brandon (as Connor):Oh, shit. Yes.
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Connor, rip it in half, rip it in half.
Brandon (as Connor): Bye!
Eric (as Anita Tigre): Go, now, now, bye!
Amanda: This is so cute. I can watch this all day.
Brandon: I mean, let's be honest. He takes it between two fingers and just goes, "Prrrkkk."
Eric: I love that you just have a box of, like, 200 burner phones.
Amanda: Yeah.
Julia: Hell yeah, dawg.
Brandon: I feel like there's someone on camp— I was thinking about this, I feel like there's someone on campus who has the power of, like, matter manipulation, who just, like, wears a trench coat and it's like, "What do you need? What do you need? What you need? You need trading cards? You need cell phones? You need chips? You need Takis?"
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: Oh. Of course.
Amanda: Great.
Julia: There's definitely, like, a Technomancer, I guess.
Amanda: Yeah,
Julia: Who can, like, reconfigure your phone to make it a burner each time.
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Eric: Oh, just— who just wipes it for you?
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Julia: They literally wipe it and then it wipes all the information on the phone, yeah.
Eric: Hmm.
Brandon: He only deals in— you have to trade him weed every time.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: BFFs with Craft.
Brandon Uh-hmm.
Julia: BFFs. His— sorry, real quick. His name is Cyberpunk.
Brandon: Hmm.
Eric: Oh, sure.
Amanda: Nice.
Julia: Because he's a punk.
Eric: Craft?
Julia (as Craft): Sup?
Eric: You fell asleep during Calculus again.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, yeah, that happens.
Eric: And it's been— how many days has it been you fell out of sleep in Calculus again? Have— are you— wait, are you retaking Calculus?
Julia (as Craft): Hard to say if I took it last year or not. I don't— it was some kind of math.
Eric: I think that you're in Mr. Dever's class again, because they just kind of left you and you just wake up in the class— sleeping in the classroom.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Julia (as Craft): What period is it?
Eric: You look up, it's seventh now.
Julia (as Craft): Okay. I don't know where I'm supposed to be now.
Julia: I think, like, she pulls out, like, a little card that's got her schedule being like—
Julia (as Craft): Fuck.
Eric: Bink, bunk, bonk, bunk, bink. Something is knocking up against the window.
Julia: I look.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, no. I know what it is.
Eric: There is a drone holding a little present for you, bumping up against the window.
Julia (as Craft): No, no.
Julia: Craft just looks at it through the window and shakes her head.
Julia (as Craft): No.
Eric: Bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk, bonk.
Julia (as Craft): I don't want it. Send it back.
Eric: The drone shrugs and just keeps bonking up against the window.
Julia (as Craft): Why did he put shoulders— oh, okay, whatever. It doesn't matter.
Julia: Opens the window, grabs it, and closes it really quick.
Julia (as Craft): What?
Eric: That's good because the weather core that is inside of this drone, was charging up and was about to blast everything with extra hot sunlight.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah. Well—
Eric: So it's probably for the best that you grabbed it.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah, yeah.
Eric: And then the drone has a party favor and goes, "Brrrr."
Julia: Uh-hmm.
Eric: Shoots it at you.
Julia (as Craft): He's just— like why does he have to also be festive, you know? Like, it's bad enough that this is his whole thing, but then— whatever. No notes. Don't— you can't send notes back with the drone.
Eric: This drone gestures the present at you.
Julia (as Craft): Okay. All right. Enough. You, enough. You want to get blasted? This is how you get blasted.
Eric: It shrugs its shoulders again.
Julia (as Craft): Stop it. Fucking rude.
Julia: She opens the package.
Eric: It is an extra, extra, extra-large sweatshirt that says, "I'm going to college next year and my daddy's gonna miss me."
Amanda: Eric, that's the most sinister thing you've ever said on this podcast.
Julia (as Craft): I need you to send back a note to the— actually, hold on.
Julia: And Craft, like, reaches around and, like, flips the switch on the drone, because she knows where all the on-off things are.
Eric: Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm. Uh-hmm.
Julia: She goes—
Julia (as Craft): I'm gonna take you to Cyberpunk, and now I'm gonna have a drone. Fuck you, dad.
Eric (as drone): Off switch engaged. Self-destruct in 10, 9, 8—
Julia (as Craft): No, no, no.
Julia: She zaps it. Like, just enough to, like, short circuit it.
Eric: Oh, I want to see what happens here. I think that you are— I think you're unleashing your powers, because although it— you're not taking— it's not fighting you, but you are changing the environment here, so you're gonna roll plus freak.
Julia: Ooh, my plus freak right now is minus one.
Eric: Uh-oh. Uh-oh.
Brandon: Yeah. Uh-oh.
Julia: Uh-oh.
Brandon: Ahhh. Ahh.
Julia: Okay. That was really bad. I rolled a two.
Brandon: Oh, no.
Eric: Two minus one?
Julia: No, it was— no, it was a three minus one for a two.
Eric: Oh, still good, still good.
Amanda: Well, you mark potential.
Eric: Mark potential.
Julia: Mark potential, okay.
Eric: Congratulations.
Julia: Oh, boy. Oh, no.
Eric: Oh, my God. Oh, okay. So you zap it—
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: —and the countdown just goes—
Eric (as drone): Tampering with the electronics.
Julia: Rude.
Eric (as drone): Two, one. [explosion]
Eric: And just, like, the door of the classroom explodes from outside, all of the windows explode. It's just bright light that just blasts outwards and Craft, you are totally sunburned.
Brandon: And which of your limbs falls off?
Amanda: Wow.
Julia: Pick a limb.
Eric: You are totally sunburned, and I think you can mark either hopeless or insecure, because you can be insecure by the fact that you are sunburned and embarrassed, and that this— people definitely noticed, or you're hopeless that Dr. Prometheus will follow you forever, and there's nothing you can do about it.
Julia: I think I'm gonna do hopeless, if only because this is gonna heal really quickly for Craft because of her regeneration powers.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: So—
Eric: Sure.
Julia: —yeah, the emotional thing seems more appropriate.
Brandon: Is the only way to clear a condition with the clearing conditions thing or—
Eric: Someone else can clear a condition for you, if they're supporting you or taking care of you. And there's also other stuff that you can clear conditions.
Julia: Yeah. Craft is already thinking, being like—
Julia (as Craft): I gotta reschedule that appointment with Miss Rita to sooner.
Julia: Did the sweatshirt fully burn in that?
Eric: No, the sweatshirt's still there.
Amanda: Sweatshirt's fireproof? Oh, no.
Eric: Sweatshirt's fireproof.
Julia: Craft is just like—
Julia (as Craft): This would have been better if it said, "Daddy's gonna pay for it." So when did he start calling himself daddy in my mind? That's not good. I don't like that.
Eric (as Rick): You know, this would affect your ranking, but I don't think it could go any lower. I don't do the math, so I wouldn't be able to tell you.
Eric: And out the window, Powers is just hovering.
Eric (as Rick): I'm on defense monitor today. What— what's going on?
Julia (as Craft): Drone exploded.
Eric (as Rick): Can you give me more detail about the drone?
Julia (as Craft): A drone came to the window, and I opened it, and then the drone exploded.
Eric (as Rick): I'm gonna have to follow my intuition here, but I'm gonna say this to you, and don't think that I'm profiling you, but was it from your villain dad, who sends it to— who sends drones to the school every— like once a quarter?
Julia (as Craft): Why do I need to answer that question for you, Powers?
Eric (as Rick): I have to put it in the report.
Eric: And he's holding up just like a yellow pad that has the word boom on it.
Julia (as Craft): It wasn't like it was— it didn't say the property of Dr. Prometheus on it, Powers, you know?
Julia: As Craft starts crumbling the sweatshirt into a ball so that the obvious daddy portion of it is not available.
Eric (as Rick): Did the drone drop anything off? Like the thing you're crumbling up right now?
Julia (as Craft): No, I've owned this sweatshirt forever.
Eric (as Rick): Oh. Can I see it?
Julia (as Craft): No.
Eric (as Rick): So the drone didn't drop anything off. It just exploded?
Julia (as Craft): Who can say why, or what drones do? You know? When you think about it, we're all drones.
Eric (as Rick): You're so— how high are you right now, Craft? You have to tell me. Not— so not—
Julia (as Craft): I literally don't. I actually really don't.
Eric (as Rick): I'm not gonna put it in my report. I just need to calibrate what I'm— how I'm having this conversation.
Julia (as Craft): Powers, I don't have to tell you shit about shit, so deuces.
Julia: And then Craft leaves.
Eric: Powers says to himself—
Eric (as Rick): I'm gonna miss her next year.
Eric: And just floats away. His feet have been kept up by wind, just like little wind spirals and he just kind of floats away running in his yellow notebook.
Julia: Crash is like—
Julia (as Craft): I always knew he had a crush on me. Anyway—
Brandon: I love the idea that there's little yellow incident reports just say like, "Blam," and, "splat", and fizzle.
Julia: Pow.
Brandon: And pow.
Amanda: I was thinking the same thing, Brandon. Like, choose the one that best represents the accident.
Brandon: Yeah.
Amanda: It's a bang sometimes, sometimes a boom.
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Julia: Fist fight, pow, explosion, boom.
Eric: Let's fast forward to later on, when— after class, where you're working on your senior project here. What are you thinking? What do you want to do?
Amanda: Guys, where's our hangout? Where do we go—
Brandon: Yeah, that's what I was going to ask..
Amanda: —to, like, plot and plan as a team?
Julia: I really like that there's maybe like a rooftop area in the dorms.
Brandon: Ooh.
Amanda: Hmm.
Brandon: Like in the condos or whatever, yeah.
Amanda: Yeah, I like it.
Brandon: Wherever we go, Connor has brought his nicest plate, which is a plastic piece of shit, serving platter plate, and then took out all the Twinkies from the packages and neatly arranged them.
Julia: Hell yeah.
Brandon: For snacks.
Amanda: Cute.
Julia: So cool.
Amanda: That's great. Yeah, no, I think rooftop makes a ton of sense, because Craft can smoke—
Julia: Uh-hmm. That's what I was thinking.
Amanda: —and Connor, and Row can, you know, feel connected to the universe.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Amanda: Cool. So I think over time, we've probably stashed, like, a picnic table, maybe like an old cooler, probably like a couple umbrellas and sun shield we can hook up with, like a carabiner and a tarp, you know, during sunny days.
Julia: It's also got the propane heater for when it's winter time.
Amanda: Exactly, yeah. So I think we probably like recycled a little, like, lock box locker from someone moving out one year. So it's all beaten to shit and dented with stickers all over it, but that's where we hang out.
Brandon: I love that.
Amanda: So we’re gonna meet up there.
Brandon: It's— Craft can smoke, Rowan can think about the universe, and no one has to look at Connor.
Julia: While he's eating.
Amanda (as Rowan): So I have a couple of leads.
Julia (as Craft): I also have the list of villains that I should not interview because of personal reasons.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, great.
Julia: And then slides, like, four pages over to the group.
Brandon (as Connor): This is a full report you made, Craft.
Amanda (as Rowan): There's so many.
Julia (as Craft): Well, they all suck.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, they're villains.
Julia (as Craft): But, like, they suck personally, you know?
Amanda (as Rowan): Okay. Well, is one of them a loosely associated group of cousins called Cloud Cover?
Julia (as Craft): No, they were never invited to the Christmas parties.
Amanda (as Rowan): Great. I have some intel. I was looking at the news and stuff. And apparently, they've been like, holding up grocery stores and liquor stores, and so we can just, like, go and take them down. And I think, because there's multiple of them, that'd be really interesting.
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, okay. Are they cloud in texture? Like, can they escape through, you know, bars or something, or, like, a net?
Amanda (as Rowan): Undetermined.
Brandon (as Connor): Okay.
Amanda (as Rowan): Undetermined.
Julia (as Craft): Do you have the— do you have, like, the news article and, like, maybe there's security footage we can see them using their powers?
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Amanda: And I think Rowan pulls up on her phone, like a short, like vertical video showing— I'm just picturing, like, full, sort of upstate New York goons, where you see coming out of their hands, like unfurling cloud that looks like a whip, like it's strong and condensed, and it can free stuff or touch stuff, or, you know, saturate it.
Brandon: Cool.
Eric: Well, the one who has the most water-based pow— water and ice-based powers, that's Cumulus.
Julia: Of course.
Eric: Where they can form clouds and objects that deals with water and ice.
Julia: That's Claire Cumulus.
Eric: Claire— yeah, Claire Cumulus. There's the muscle, who's Clark Cumulonimbus.
Julia: Gotcha. Of course.
Eric: Big dude. Boom, boom, thunderclaps. Absolutely. There's Cirrus who is—
Julia: Cyrus Cirrus.
Eric: Cyrus Cirrus who is fast and small. He's, like, 11.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: Oh, no.
Eric: Like, one of those cousins.
Amanda (as Rowan): Too young.
Julia (as Craft): How do we feel about doing a child?
Amanda (as Rowan): Too young.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah.
Brandon (as Connor): Not good about it.
Amanda (as Rowan): No, it's like early psychology of villainy.
Julia (as Craft): Oh.
Brandon (as Connor): I don't want to capture a child at a box or whatever we do.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, we're putting them in boxes? That's kind of fun.
Brandon (as Connor): I don't know, man.
Eric: And Cindy Stratus can create hazes around to— for them to
escape.
Brandon (as Connor): Ooh.
Julia (as Craft): Right, for blocking the cameras and shit like that.
Brandon: I gotta say, this is a good gang.
Amanda: I know, I don't want to take them down.
Eric: Except they're absolute jamooks.
Julia (as Craft): I like that we've also created another set of criminal upstate cousins.
Eric: That's how we do. That's how we do.
Amanda: What else is there to do up there, Julia?
Eric: Let's do rob liquor and grocery stores.
Julia (as Craft): All right, that's an option. Connor, what do you have?
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, yeah. That's a great option. I also talked to my aunt just to see if there's any good leads.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, how's the Tigre doing?
Brandon (as Connor): I mean, she's fucking killing it over there. You know? I heard her yelling at some dumbass golden hero—
Amanda (as Rowan): So cool.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, sick.
Brandon (as Connor): —who thought they were, like, the shit. She was like, "I'm not— I don't even have powers and I'm, like, cooler than, smarter than you." You know?
Julia (as Craft): Hell yeah.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): She's my hero.
Brandon (as Connor): Mine too, yeah. She said that— lot of vague shit, and then was like, "Here's an actual, exact address."
Julia (as Craft): Oh, fuck. Let's do this shit.
Amanda (as Rowan): Whoa. Where something's gonna go down?
Brandon (as Connor): I don't— I'm not 100% sure. She was a little vague on it, because she didn't want to— you know, she gave me the answers outright, I don't think, but like, something's gonna go down there that we can go. And, like, she wouldn't give us someone that we couldn't handle, you know? So that would be an option.
Julia (as Craft): Do you want to go, like, tonight? Like, how pressing did it seem like?
Brandon (as Connor): Probably tonight, I would assume, yeah.
Julia (as Craft): Hell yeah.
Brandon (as Connor): I could do— you know, she doesn't have, like, intel, like, a week out, so I would assume it'd be tonight, yeah.
Amanda (as Rowan): Wait, what if Dr. Mo said that we had two weeks, but really it's like, "Villainy waits for no one, man." And then, the quicker we do it, the better it is, because, then, no one will be in danger. Because if we're actually heroes, you don't— you're not gonna wait 12 days to deal with them. You're going to do it right now.
Brandon (as Connor): There's no deadlines on crime. You're right, bro.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): We also, if we get it done faster, can just like coast for the next 12 days.
Brandon (as Connor): That's true.
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): Right?
Amanda (as Rowan): And then we'll be back in time for the party. We can hang out with Wraith rape more.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah. Man, I fucking love Wraith.
Amanda (as Rowan): She's so cool. Why is she hanging out with those losers?
Brandon (as Connor): I don't know. I really want her as our alternate, you know?
Amanda (as Rowan): Yeah.
Julia (as Craft): Can we just have four people? Have we considered having just a fourth—
Brandon (as Connor): Not according to school rules.
Julia (as Craft): Well—
Brandon (as Connor): But we could.
Julia (as Craft): Yeah.
Eric: So I— you have your two options here. Do you want to try to figure out where Cloud Cover is going to be or do you want to go to the address?
Julia (as Craft): I think the address is our best lead right now, because who knows what liquor store those cousins are going to go to. But like this address, we can scope it out—
Eric: Hmm.
Julia (as Craft): —and see what's what.
Brandon: Let's go to the address, the one that was like a Circle Drive penumbra—
Amanda: Evergreen Superville.
Julia: Super Court.
Eric: Yeah, it's a joke with the writers of this comic that they just changed the name of the street when they show up, totally different numbers, totally different words.
Amanda: Okay. Incredible.
Eric: And you just go— you're just at 2574 Super Court Green Forest—
Brandon: Yeah, exactly. Yeah.
Eric: —Boulevard.
Brandon Uh-hmm. And it's not the wrong address, it's the correct one.
Eric: It's the correct address.
Julia: It is correct.
Eric: That's where it is. There's a panel off screen where Connor says, "This is it." There's like a little—
Julia: Cute.
Eric: —speech bubble where Connor says it— regardless of what the address is.
Amanda: Exactly. I think we're, like, lurking behind the hedge or a mailbox or something that is, like, comically too small to hide all of us.
Brandon: Comically too small?
Eric: You come up on 7474 Oops, All Greenery Terrace.
Julia: Yeah.
Eric: And you're coming around the street. There's been an influx of development in Jupiter, so this is another— this is a cookie cutter-esque new development where everything looks a little fake.
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Eric: You're like, "Why am I on the set of a movie? Where did they get all these— they built all these houses, like, immediately, out of plywood. Okay."
Julia: Feeling real Truman Show here.
Eric: All these houses are super close to each other. You find the one that you're looking for with the address that is totally correct. And as you're coming around the corner, you see that someone is ringing the doorbell right now.
Brandon (as Connor): Someone's ringing the doorbell right now.
Amanda (as Rowan): Wait, Connor, did anyone overhear you?
Julia (as Craft): Hide.
Brandon (as Connor): I mean, I hope not. I don't think so. I mean, I didn't hear anything.
Julia (as Craft): Just hide. It's probably the villain that we're trying to—
Amanda (as Rowan): Okay, come here, come here, come here.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, catch.
Amanda: I think one of the things we often do is that Rowan will, like, float up a little bit of, like, brush to cover us. Like, float up—
Brandon: Ooh.
Amanda: —kind of, like, the pine needles and, like, whatever loose leaves are on the ground to sort of be, like, hovering above a bush or a tree to help make it more solid for us to hide behind.
Brandon: I love that. That's cool. And then, yeah, Connor's going to extend his hearing to try to eavesdrop.
Eric: Hmm.
Amanda: Nice.
Eric: There is a figure standing at the front door that is ringing the doorbell rhythmically every three seconds. Ding, dong. Ding, dong. Ding, dong. The figure is in a black pinstripe suit, but it's like slightly hex code 0000 on hex code 00001, so in— only Connor with his super senses could see the pinstripe.
Julia: It's very funny.
Eric: What does it sound like when you're, like, trying to listen in on a person? What do you hear?
Brandon: I think originally it was really chaotic, right? Because, like, when he was learning how to hone it, it was— you know, you could hear the blood rushing. You could hear hearts. You could hear—
Eric: Uh-hmm.
Brandon: —your eyeballs twitching. You know, you could hear anything and everything. But now that, I think he's gotten better at it and honing it, he can sort of like, zoom in on what he's trying to hear. So, like, yeah, if he's trying to hear if someone is lying, he can listen to their heartbeat, see if they're panicked or not. And I think in this case, maybe he's like— I think he's sort of doing a sweep, but I think he's maybe listening in on the lips. And you know that thing where, like, you're like very, very minutely, maybe moving your lips of like, "Come on, pick up, pick up or answer or whatever."
Amanda: Hmm.
Eric: Yeah.
Brandon: Trying to see if there's anything on this person's lips of, like, what's going on, what they're expecting.
Eric: That's what's most disturbing to you, because you don't hear any of the regular human bodily functions, but you hear squelching of something in this suit, just moving, and glorping, and squelching throughout it.
Brandon (as Connor): Ugh.
Eric: And it's pulled together in this suit. It's hard for you to get a good look at it, because the sun is setting behind everything. So you just really see the outline of this figure ringing the doorbell. And if you're doing rhythmically, it is menacingly. What do you all do?
Julia (as Craft): Connor, what's up?
Brandon (as Connor): It's kind of exactly the kind of thing you wouldn't want to hear on a podcast, you know? Like mouth sounds and shit. There's something gross in that suit. It's like squelchy and gooey.
Julia (as Craft): Rowan just squish him.
Amanda: All right. Rowan kneels down, focuses her energy, and you see her hands go from about basketball width apart to, like, softball width apart, as she is trying to manipulate gravity around this figure to hold them in place, in stasis.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, dude.
Julia (as Craft): Let's just hold them there until the door opens and then see what happens.
Brandon (as Connor): Yeah, smart.
Amanda: Rowan nods, concentrating.
Eric: Let's see how that goes. What do you think you're doing here? Because I think there's a few things here. You could provoke this figure to distract them, and they'd look at you instead. You could directly engage a threat, if you're trying to just get in their face.
Amanda: I would argue that I'm unleashing my powers because I think I'm trying to reshape my environment to, like, hold everything that's happening until the potential threat in the house gets to respond. Like, I don't know if this person is a villain or just in the wrong place at the wrong time, but I'm trying to, like, reshape my environment to essentially freeze them, to, like, freeze time.
Brandon: You can also be directly engaging a threat and taking something from them, which is their autonomy.
Eric: I think you would directly be engaging a threat. I agree with Brandon.
Amanda: All right. I am afraid right now, so I am gonna have negative two to directly engage a threat.
Brandon: Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I mean, I didn't say anything.
Amanda: Yeah. It's fine.
Eric: No, you can do— I would say you are not unleashing your powers. I think there are better moves here—
Amanda: All right.
Eric: —that address it. So I think you can either directly engage a threat if you are willing to trade blows with this character, or you can provoke someone if you want them to do something. Actually, I think that's more what it would be. It's like you're trying to hold them. What you want to do is distract them from what they're doing.
Amanda: I think the most honest answer is I'm directly engaging a threat, even though I'm afraid.
Eric: All right, let's directly engage a threat, baby.
Amanda: All right.
Julia: Let's go.
Amanda: Okay. So what I rolled is an eight on the dice. I have plus three to danger and then negative two—
Julia: Hell yeah.
Amanda: —because I'm afraid. So an eight plus one is a nine.
Brandon: That's a nine, baby.
Julia: Would you like to bring it up one, though?
Amanda: I think we should.
Brandon: With your team.
Julia: You should.
Amanda: Yes.
Julia: Please take a team.
Amanda: Absolutely. All right, I'll take a team then, as Craft and Connor are, like, crouched behind me on both sides. I know that they're covering my back. I don't worry about what's happening to me right now. I can focus totally on engaging this threat.
Eric: Yeah. Who is helping you here? You have to do something in order to push it forward.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Brandon: I got an idea. So I have a move called be the monster, which is when I frighten, intimidate or cow others. So I'm just going to, like— I see Rowan sort of struggling to keep this thing together, so I'm going to dash over there before the door opens, and using my big, hulky monstrous form, like come out of the shadow only just see my eyes, the horrible, weird whiteness and color of my eyes, and then, like, in my deepest, most fearful voice, say, like—
Brandon (as Connor): Move and you die.
Eric: Great. Yeah, Connor—
Amanda: Great.
Eric: —you are definitely pulling attention. Absolutely. Wonderful. All right, that's a 10. On—
Amanda: Yeah.
Eric: On a hit, you still trade blows, but on 10, you can pick two.
Amanda: I think let's take their autonomy, their ability to move from them. I think this creature is completely immobilized.
Eric: Take something from them, sure.
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Amanda: And then what do you guys think, create an opportunity? So that when the door opens, we can, like, really surprise the person.
Julia: Either that or surprise the opposition.
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Brandon: Yeah.
Julia: which is the person potentially coming to the door.
Brandon: Or frighten the person, so they sort of like do what we want, so we can capture them.
Julia: I don’t know if this is a person, though.
Eric: Let me— yeah, let me know.
Julia: You know?
Eric: So the opposition, we're talking about the person in the suit, so you can either just set this up as a new opportunity, or you could do some of the other things.
Amanda: I think let's create an opportunity for our allies. Rowan is going to move the figure forward toward the door, so that it's like blocking the sight line from anyone who might be opening the door and then we can, kind of like, creep in, almost the cone made by their body—
Brandon: Hmm.
Amanda: —to, like, lurk behind them. Connor's already over there. We'll bring Craft and then Gravitas in Hero Mode. We're gonna kind of like inch forward across the street, up the lawn, up the walk, to crouch behind them and wait for the door to open.
Eric: Okay. You don't want to resist the blows?
Amanda: No.
Eric: Okay. That sounds good. So—
Julia: This is also going to reveal information about this—
Amanda: Uh-hmm.
Julia: —character to us, so that's good.
Eric: Absolutely. Tell me— remind me, what does it look like of someone being held by gravity?
Amanda: Have you ever seen a diagram of Earth with, like, the magnetic fields coming, like, off the poles into the, you know, equator and stuff?
Brandon: Uh-hmm.
Julia: Yeah.
Amanda: I think that anytime Rowan uses her powers, the panel is duplicated. And there's one version that everyone else sees and one version that is, instead of black and white, blue and white.
Brandon: Hmm.
Amanda: Where you see the, like, physics and relationship between all of these forces, almost like a topographical map, where you can see this, like, constrain that matches the shape of her hands. And so in this case, looks like two giant hands smushing this figure, like an aggressive version of the gravity blanket.
Eric: It is— that's—
Julia: Cool as fuck.
Eric: I'm glad that you described it like that, because that's how I saw it as well. Because when you squeeze this figure, its body squeezes out of the suit, and you— as you are all now getting closer, you see that green ooze is squishing out of this hold, out of the top. It flings ooze at you and gets you right in the face, Rowan, and you are choking.
Amanda (as Rowan): I got the top. I forgot the top.
Eric: I want you to take a powerful blow.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Julia: Roll low, baby, roll low.
Eric: So remember, you're rolling plus the number of conditions you have.
Amanda: Well, unfortunately, Julia, it's a six plus five plus one, so that's a 12.
Julia: Six plus five plus one?
Amanda: Yep. So I have to remove myself from the situation, flee, pass out, et cetera. Lose control of myself or my powers in a terrible way, or two options below.
Eric: Or two options from the seven to nine list, which are also tough.
Amanda: Oh, boy.
Julia: We still have four in the pool. No, we can only do up to two.
Amanda: Only up to two.
Julia: Fuck. Oh, boy. Oh, Nelly.
Eric: No matter what you choose from this list, I'm gonna tell you how it goes.
Amanda: Oh, no, consequences from my high roll.
Brandon Damn.
Julia: Oh, boy.
Eric: Ha-ha-ha. You ran into a situation and now you're choking on ooze. And now bad things are happening.
Amanda: I mean, I think it's gonna be lose control of myself or my powers in a terrible way. I don't think Rowan can do this and get hit in the face with a goo that's choking her and not freak out.
Eric: For sure.
Brandon: Fair.
Eric: Remember how I described that all of the houses are super close to each other? I think that your grip on this ooze is bigger than you think. And I think the radius is like 100, 200 feet, and you are grabbing doors, windows, garage doors, roof tiles. Literally— maybe you're moving a house or two off their foundation and shin pulling it towards the ooze. All of it is getting like, sucked in, almost like a black hole.
Amanda: Oh, no.
Brandon: And Connor dodges a door that's swinging at him and goes—
Brandon (as Connor): Oh, shit! Rowan. Stop. Rowan, Rowan.
Amanda (as Rowan): Ugh. Ugh.
Amanda: And she's like, just scraping this goo off of her face.
Julia: Yeah, Craft's already trying to, like, grab parts of it that you can't reach and is like—
Julia (as Craft): All right, come on. We can get this off.
Eric: Okay. Now, the ooze in the suit is, like, just extended out, like when you squeeze a stress toy too much. And that is when the door opens and a couple is standing in the doorway.
Eric (as couple): We told you for the last few nights, we told you we're not interested. Leave us alone. I don't care how many people you bring with you, we're not letting you close to our child.
Julia (as Craft): Oh, this thing's trying to take kids? Fuck.
Julia: What I would like to do is Craft is gonna turn and look at these people, be like—
Julia (as Craft): Oh, shit. This thing is trying to take kids.
Julia: And look at this couple and, like, try to, like, see their vibe and their relationship between this goo-suited figure.
Brandon: Besuited goo.
Eric: You definitely have the opportunity where things are held for a moment. You can assess the situation.
Julia: Great. [dice roll] That is a seven plus zero.
Eric: Ask me a question.
Amanda: I think what here is in the greatest danger is always a good way to tell who needs protecting.
Julia: Yeah.
Brandon: Yeah, because if it's— if we fucked up, and it's actually the slime that's in the greatest danger or whatever.
Amanda: Right.
Julia: Yeah. Well, I'll do that. What here is in the greatest danger?
Brandon: Oh, I guess you could argue that it's the slime anyway, because Rowan's crushing it into oblivion.
Eric: What here is in the greatest danger? I'd say it's probably all of the people that are coming out of their houses, because Rowan has pulled some of the houses off their foundations, and all of the—
Amanda: Fuck.
Eric: Folks— so people are coming out of their houses. There is a crowd forming surrounding all of you. And I think the reason why they're in the greatest danger is that the ooze in the suit is stuck with Rowan. Maybe Rowan is the greatest danger. But behind the couple, you hear—
Eric as (12-year-old girl in a hockey jersey): Hey, what's going on? Who is that? Is that the guy from last night?
Eric: And behind the couple is a middle school girl wearing a bike helmet and a Buffalo Sabers child's hockey jersey and shorts.
Julia: Oh, no, that's too cute.
Eric: The couple is startled, so they— by— her behind them, so they get out of the way for a second. They say—
Eric (as couple): No, wait, no.
Eric: And the sun, the setting sun, comes in through the doorway, settling on the middle school girl, and she starts to change.
Julia: Oh, damn.
Eric: She gets bigger, and bigger, and bigger, and ripped out of her clothes. Her bike helmet bursts off because there is a— there is— because there is a magical warrior, eight feet tall with a jaguar head that pushes past—
Julia: It's gonna resist. Could you?
Eric: No, I can't. Who pushes past the couple, grabs the sunset sunlight, and turns it into a double-sided spear and starts running away, busting through the crowd.
Julia (as Craft): I really didn't think it was that high.
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